Maz Jobrani Quotes
I don't consider myself an Iranian comedian; I consider myself a comedian who happens to be of Iranian descent.
Quotes to Explore
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I was in a Nativity play as a kid. Back then, I played the donkey.
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You got me: I do Pilates. I love Pilates because we do very specific training in soccer for the same six or seven muscles, but we neglect so many other muscles. So when I do Pilates, it helps get all the rest of the muscles in shape and gets them working together.
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I couldn't live up to it. So I chose to run away.
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When improv is bad, it's excruciating to watch, and to be involved with it is a unique type of torture.
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Every woman looks good in a flamenco dress.
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Fantasy is sort of a blank slate that everybody can project their own culture onto. Everybody can read it in their own way.
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A lot of people thought you couldn't be a top-level athlete as a vegan, but people like Mac Danzig and Jake Shields are proving that's wrong. And it's better for me as a performer.
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Of all liars the most arrogant are biographers: those who would have us believe, having surveyed a few boxes full of letters, diaries, bank statements and photographs, that they can play at the recording angel and tell the whole truth about another human life.
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When you're in a high-stress situation, dynamics between people can change.
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It seems no matter what you say and how politically correctly and carefully you say it, you offend someone. Or at least I always do.
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For your information, I would like to ask a question.
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My name is Bolt, Lightning Bolt.
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I was ten years old in 1969, and while we lived in Arizona that year, I spent most of the summer staying with family friends in Portland, Oregon while my parents visited Spain. It was an adventure all around.
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I used to think that the Civil War was our country's greatest tragedy, but I do remember that there were some redeeming features in the Civil War in that there was some spirit of sacrifice and heroism displayed on both sides. I see no redeeming features in Watergate.
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When I look at a pie chart, I just go numb.
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Stephane Richard is far more attuned to the market than Didier Lombard.
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I can write with absolutely perfect penmanship with my feet. If I broke both my arms, I could still write a girl a love letter using just my toes.
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When I started teaching at Stanford Graduate School of Business in 2000, no field-based courses in strategic philanthropy existed.
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I can't change something that I've been all my life. But I can work to express myself and talk more.
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Never go for the money. You have to match the job and your values so you can bring your whole self.
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She closed her eyes. And while her intellect wouldn’t let her realize her deepest fear, that all this might soon be gone forever, nevertheless she stood there for a time and worshipped the only way a person like her could worship-in silence and solitude, under the temple of the sky.
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I do not allow myself to be moved by anything except the law. If there has been a mistake in the law, or if I think there has beenperjury or injustice, I will weigh the petition most carefully, but I do not permit myself to be moved by more harrowing details, and I try to treat each case as if I was reviewing it or hearing it for the first time from the bench.
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I don't consider myself an Iranian comedian; I consider myself a comedian who happens to be of Iranian descent.
