Joseph Heller Quotes
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It doesn't make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who's dead.
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Yossarian was cold, too, and shivering uncontrollably. He felt goose pimples clacking all over him as he gazed down despondently at the grim secret Snowden had spilled all over the messy floor. It was easy to read the message in his entrails. Man was matter, that was Snowden's secret. Drop him out a window and he'll fall. Set fire to him and he'll burn. Bury him and he'll rot, like other kinds of garbage. The spirit gone, man is garbage. That was Snowden's secret. Ripeness was all. I'm cold,' Snowden said. 'I'm cold.
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The problem with the loneliness I suffer is that the company of others has never been a cure for it.
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But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that it paid well and liberated children from the pernicious influence of their parents.
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Catch-22 did not exist, he was positive of that, but it made no difference. What did matter was that everyone thought it existed, and that was much worse, for there was no object or text to ridicule or refute, to accuse, criticize, attack, amend, hate, revile, spit at, rip to shreds, trample upon or burn up.
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I think that maybe inside any business, there is someone slowly going crazy
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The body stores the trauma of our lives in muscular rigidity, thereby keeping us stuck in the past. When we release the tension in the body and align ourselves with gravity, we take a new stand in life. This allows us to be at ease with ourselves and in harmony in our relationship to others and to our planet.
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They agreed that it was neither possible nor necessary to educate people who never questioned anything.
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Why are they going to disappear him?' I don't know.' It doesn't make sense. It isn't even good grammar.
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Under Colonel Korn's rule, the only people permitted to ask questions were those who never did.
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You wouldn’t be normal if you were never afraid. Even the bravest men experience fear. One of the biggest jobs we all face in combat is to overcome fear.
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I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long.
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She was the epitome of stately sorrow each time she smiled.
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The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
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Clevinger had a mind, and Lieutenant Scheisskoph had noticed that people with minds tended to get pretty smart at times.
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Major Major never sees anyone in his office while he's in his office.
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Now you've given them hope, and they're unhappy. So the blame is all yours.
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Erogenous zones are either everywhere or nowhere.
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Let someone else get killed!
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Men went mad and were rewarded with medals.
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Yossarian decided to change the subject. "Now you're changing the subject." he pointed out diplomatically. "I'll bet I can name two things to be miserable about for every one you can name to be thankful for.
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Prostitution gives her an opportunity to meet people. It provides fresh air and wholesome exercise, and it keeps her out of trouble.
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The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren't paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.
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Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.