Joseph Heller Quotes
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Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.
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The problem with the loneliness I suffer is that the company of others has never been a cure for it.
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Well, he died. You don't get any older than that.
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If character is destiny, the good are damned.
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Gold was not sure of many things, but he was definite about one: for every successful person he knew, he could name at least two others of greater ability, better, and higher intelligence who, by comparison, had failed.
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Now you've given them hope, and they're unhappy. So the blame is all yours.
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I can't start writing until I have a closing line.
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Why are they going to disappear him?' I don't know.' It doesn't make sense. It isn't even good grammar.
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Major Major never sees anyone in his office while he's in his office.
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The frog is almost five hundred million years old. Could you really say with much certainty that America, with all its strength and prosperity, with its fighting man that is second to none, and with its standard of living that is highest in the world, will last as long as...the frog?
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I don't think it's good to achieve too much at too early an age. What else can the future give you if you've already got all that your imagination has dreamt up for you? A writer is only discovered once in a lifetime, and if it happens very early the impossibility of matching that moment again can have a somewhat corrosive effect on his personality and indeed on the work itself.
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Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.
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If Richard Nixon was second-rate, what in the world is third-rate?
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Men went mad and were rewarded with medals.
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In short, Clevinger was one of those people with lots of intelligence and no brains, and everyone knew it except those who soon found it out.
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You have deep-seated survival anxieties. And you don't like bigots, bullies, snobs or hypocrites. Subconsciously there are many people you hate." "Consciously, sir, consciously," Yossarian corrected in an effort to help. "I hate them consciously.
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The country was in peril; he was jeopardizing his traditional rights of freedom and independence by daring to exercise them.
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I could not write about a subject sacred to me because I would be too flippant. Fortunately, there are no subjects sacred to me.
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I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any.
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Yossarian decided to change the subject. "Now you're changing the subject." he pointed out diplomatically. "I'll bet I can name two things to be miserable about for every one you can name to be thankful for.
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There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
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If God was dead, how could I feel this bad?
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Everything passes. (That's what makes it endurable.)
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Nurse Duckett found Yossarian wonderful and was already trying to change him.