Joseph Heller Quotes
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But the God I don't believe in is a good God, a just God, a merciful God. He's not the mean and stupid God you make him out to be.
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The country was in peril; he was jeopardizing his traditional rights of freedom and independence by daring to exercise them.
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There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
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Gold was not sure of many things, but he was definite about one: for every successful person he knew, he could name at least two others of greater ability, better, and higher intelligence who, by comparison, had failed.
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It's a wise person, I guess, who knows he's dumb, and an honest person who knows he's a liar. And it's a dumb person, I guess, whose convinced he's wise...-Bob Slocum
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The Texan turned out to be good-natured, generous and likable. In three days no one could stand him.
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Sure, that's what I mean,' Doc Daneeka said. 'A little grease is what makes this world go round. One hand washes the other. Know what I mean? You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.' Yossarian knew what he meant. That's not what I meant,' Doc Daneeka said, as Yossarian began scratching his back.
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I could not write about a subject sacred to me because I would be too flippant. Fortunately, there are no subjects sacred to me.
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Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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I can't start writing until I have a closing line.
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From now on I'm thinking only of me." Major Danby replied indulgently with a superior smile: "But, Yossarian, suppose everyone felt that way." "Then," said Yossarian, "I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldn't I?
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There's a rule saying I have to ground anyone who's crazy ... There's a catch. Catch-22. Anyone who wants to get out of combat duty isn't really crazy.
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You wouldn’t be normal if you were never afraid. Even the bravest men experience fear. One of the biggest jobs we all face in combat is to overcome fear.
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If Richard Nixon was second-rate, what in the world is third-rate?
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If character is destiny, the good are damned.
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I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private individuals.
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I don't think it's good to achieve too much at too early an age. What else can the future give you if you've already got all that your imagination has dreamt up for you? A writer is only discovered once in a lifetime, and if it happens very early the impossibility of matching that moment again can have a somewhat corrosive effect on his personality and indeed on the work itself.
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The problem with the loneliness I suffer is that the company of others has never been a cure for it.
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As always occurred when he quarreled over principles in which he believed passionately, he would end up gasping furiously for air and blinking back bitter tears of conviction. There were many principles in which Clevinger believed passionately. He was crazy.
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When I look up, I see people cashing in. I don't see heaven or saints or angels. I see people cashing in on every decent impulse and every human tragedy.
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I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long.
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Why are they going to disappear him?' I don't know.' It doesn't make sense. It isn't even good grammar.
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Nurse Duckett found Yossarian wonderful and was already trying to change him.
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Under Colonel Korn's rule, the only people permitted to ask questions were those who never did.