Erma Bombeck Quotes
Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they're not trying to keep up with you.

Quotes to Explore
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In the governments, as we've witnessed in the past, they had to hide. Because there's a lot of concentration on the friends-and-family club... We're not about that. That's not the government of the future of the State of New York. What's gonna pull this state out of the doldrums that it's in right now is an honest and open government.
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It is absolutely critical for competitiveness in the United States for us to really raise the bar in education, especially in math, in science, in technology.
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Architecture is undistinguished, sometimes derelict, but occasionally, as in 'Post and Beam,' there is something arresting in a setting... the building behind the Cathedral.
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People with water-borne diseases occupy more than 50% of hospital beds across the world. Does the answer lie in building more hospitals? Really, what is needed is to give them clean water.
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The only times I'm not relaxed are when I haven't got a project on the go.
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I can't stop people from writing imaginative stories about me entering politics.
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The Gili Islands gave me some of my best scuba diving experiences, including tons of turtles.
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At Time Warner, I had ten percent of the stock after the merger. But when we merged with AOL, I was diluted down to three percent.
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Les Miserables is one of my favorite stories.
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Business and politics have a wholesome and an unwholesome interface. You have to eliminate the unwholesome interface.
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Hollywood is horrible... it's beyond satire.
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When I think of character actors, I think of Spencer Tracy; I think of Gene Hackman, Robert Duvall. When I was a young lad watching films, my eyes were on them - watching 'On the Waterfront,' my eyes are on Rod Steiger and Karl Malden, not on Brando.
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The first 'Polly and the Pirates' is about a prim and proper girl who gets kidnapped out of her comfy boarding school by a bunch of pirates that think she's the daughter of their long lost queen. In the course of the adventure, she discovers she has a natural penchant for swashbuckling, despite her sheltered childhood.
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I was always playing the hard-bitten drunk.
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There's a balance in my life. There's reality, and there's the part that looks really glamorous, but we're all just people in the end.
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I'm proud to be involved with Simon Cowell and 'X Factor.'
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Modernity widened the distance between the sensational and the relevant.
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Offering unequal leaves just reinforces the longstanding notion that parenting responsibilities aren't equal, and that doesn't help anyone.
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Let the people know the truth and the country is safe.
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May Sarton said, "the deeper you go, the more universal you become." It's a reminder to me that those things I try to convince myself I don't need to admit are usually those things I need the most to say. Speaking the truth, in its most poignant details, is liberating and gives those around us the freedom to be real.
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I adapt more to the match for the second set.
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Clearly, America's dysfunctional food culture must bear some of the blame for our excess pounds, but it's likely our walking-averse lifestyles contribute as well.
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Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they're not trying to keep up with you.