Norm MacDonald Quotes

Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.

Norm MacDonald

• Comedy
• Laugh
• Surprises

• Previous
• Next

Quotes to Explore

• I doubt if you can have a truly wild party without liquor.

  

  Carl Sandburg
  • Party
  • Doubt
  • New Years

• When I was a kid, I wanted a Chanel bob and bangs. My mom said no. I went to the salon anyway, and they said, 'No way - we are not going to do that to your hair.' So I did it myself. Big mistake. Instead of my bangs going down straight, they were sticking up like a cat. It was horrible.

  

  Camila Alves
  • Up
  • Mom
  • Myself

• Guys play basketball and get hurt, and that's probably the easiest sport on the planet. We're actually fighting every day. We're wrestling; we're grappling.

  

  Daniel Cormier
  • Day
  • Fighting
  • Hurt

• I'm completely open about the fact that I don't love every genre of metal. I like what I like. It's got to have some vocal quality and some semblance of melody.

  

  Eddie Trunk
  • Quality
  • Like
  • Genre

• Mumbai is like Manhattan. There's a certain pace, a social life and the thrill of a professional life.

  

  Madhuri Dixit
  • Life
  • Professional
  • Pace

• You shouldn't be ashamed of your pain. You have the right to have your pain treated.

  

  Naomi Judd
  • You
  • Pain
  • Right

• As long as I have a heartbeat, I'm fine. So I just do what I love, and I do it the best that I can. And if it all goes away, I'll just start over.

  

  Pardis Sabeti
  • Long
  • Love
  • Best

• If I go out in the open ocean environment, virtually anywhere in the world, and I drag a net from 3,000 feet to the surface, most of the animals - in fact, in many places, 80 to 90 percent of the animals that I bring up in that net - make light. This makes for some pretty spectacular light shows.

  

  Edith Widder
  • Up
  • World
  • Pretty

• The sky broke like an egg into full sunset and the water caught fire.

  

  Pamela Hansford Johnson
  • Nature
  • Water
  • Fire

• If I'm chartering in and out and flying home after I play, that doesn't make sense. But where we can bus, then we'll bring the family out and spend time with them during the day.

  

  Zac Brown Band
  • Time
  • Family
  • Home

• One year, I was a patron of a new opera. It was, to put it kindly, unpleasant to the ear. The friends I went with hated it. Keeping quiet about my contribution, I was outed when one of them, reading the program at the restaurant during dinner, saw my name.

  

  Karen DeCrow
  • Friends
  • Reading
  • Dinner

• To the children of yesterday, who have grown up and become parents, and to the children of today, who perhaps shout 'Tottigol,' I'd like to think that, for you, my career has become a fairytale for you to pass on.

  

  Francesco Totti
  • Up
  • Children
  • Today

• I have fought my own battle with depression, and it was important for me to bring a little awareness about it for others.

  

  Deepika Padukone
  • Important
  • Depression

• As physics students, we are taught that physicists are smart, that chemists are moderately acceptable, and that biologists are certainly not very intelligent. So I wasn't inclined to take a biology course. But my father insisted, and maybe what he had in mind was that, if there were no jobs in physics, I would end up being a doctor.

  

  James Rothman
  • Up
  • Mind
  • Father

• 'Oh, Calcutta,' was one of the healthiest shows I've ever been in.

  

  Bill Macy

• The piano is a monster that screams when you touch its teeth.

  

  Andres Segovia
  • Monster

• You have to live with your decisions every day. Why live with one you're uneasy with? 'Because it'll make you money' is a common reply. But I don't think that's good enough.

  

  Jason Fried
  • Good
  • Live
  • Money

• I would say what you have to do as a screenwriter is strip the book back to find the skeleton. When you've found the skeleton - that's what you trust - you reclothe.

  

  David Farr
  • Book
  • Trust

• I admire many actors, though I don't think there's anyone whose career I would want to mirror sort of by the beats. What I'm really looking to do is constantly defy expectations. I'm very curious to see if you can actually have a character actor and a movie star's career combined.

  

  David Oyelowo
  • Character
  • Movie
  • Career

• I definitely think awards ceremonies should have gender-neutral categories.

  

  Vanessa Morgan
  • Awards
  • Categories
  • Ceremonies

• The cell, over the billions of years of her life, has covered the earth many times with her substance, found ways to control herself and her environment, and insure her survival.

  

  Albert Claude
  • Life
  • Earth
  • Control

• The dynamic of globalisation in financial and economic terms, but also in geopolitical terms, confronts Europeans with a stark choice: live together, share a common destiny and count in the world; or face the prospect of disunity and decline.

  

  Jose Manuel Barroso
  • World
  • Live
  • Together

• I've always maintained that I don't think comedy should be reviewed. I think it's un-reviewable, because it is so subjective.

  

  William Emerson Arnett
  • Thinking
  • Comedy
  • Should

• Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.

  

  Norm MacDonald
  • Comedy
  • Laugh
  • Surprises