Ogden Nash Quotes
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Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.
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The further through life I driftThe more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift.
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Fear not the thunder, little one.It's weather, simply weather;It's friendly giants full of funClapping their hands together.
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It is the sin of omission, the second kind of sin,That lays eggs under your skin.
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Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.
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How confusing the beams from memory's lamp are; One day a bachelor, the next a grampa. What is the secret of the trick? How did I get so old so quick?
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God in his wisdom made the fly And then forgot to tell us why.
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And I have no desire to get ugly,But I cannot help mentioning that the door of a bigoted mind opens outwards so that the only result of the pressure of facts upon it is to close it more snugly.
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It is an indication that my mental buttery is butterless and my mental larder lardless,And it consists not of 'Stop me if you've heard this one,' but of 'I know you've heard this one because I told it to you myself, but I'm going to tell it to you again regardless...'
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There are two kinds of people who blow through life like a breeze, And one kind is gossipers, and the other kind is gossipees, And they certainly annoy each other, But they certainly enjoy each other, Yes, they pretend to flout each other, But they couldn't do without each other...
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The giant was hairy, the giant was horrid,He had one eye in the middle of his forehead.
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I claim there ain't Another Saint As great as Valentine.
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The moral is that it is probably better not to sin at all, but ifsome kind of sin you must be pursuing,Well, remember to do it by doing rather than by not doing.
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I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, Were it not for making a living, which is rather a nouciance.
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Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.
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Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.
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The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.
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There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all.
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I hope of lightning our supply Will never be exhausted;You know it's lanterns in the skyFor angels who are losted.
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The garden is a raging sea, The hurricane is snarling;Oh, happy you and happy me!Isn't the lightning darling?
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Some people, and it doesn't matter whether they are paupers or millionaires,Think that anything they have is the best in the world just because it is theirs.
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Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy,You've had about seven hours' sleep since Friday,No wonder you feel that lost sensation;You're sunk from a riot of relaxation.
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If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work.
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There has been a lot of progress during my lifetime, but I'm afraid it's heading in the wrong direction.