Ogden Nash Quotes
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There is one thing that ought to be taught in all the colleges,Which is that people ought to be taught not to go around always making apologies.
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Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals?
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If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work.
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The bear said, Isabel, glad to meet you,How do, Isabel, now I'll eat you!Isabel, Isabel, didn't worry.Isabel didn't scream or scurry.
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People expect old men to die, They do not really mourn old men. Old men are different. People look At them with eyes that wonder when... People watch with unshocked eyes; But the old men know when an old man dies.
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A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
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My heart leaps up when I beholdA rainbow in the sky;Contrariwise, my blood runs coldWhen little boys go by.For little boys as little boys,No special hate I carry,But now and then they grow to men,And when they do, they marry.No matter how they tarry,Eventually they marry.And, swine among the pearls,They marry little girls.
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A lady wants to be dressed exactly like everybody else but she gets pretty up- set if she sees anybody else dressed exactly like her.
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Hark, hark! the larkOn windswept barkFreezes against a sky of lead!Now see him stop,Take one small hop,And suddenly keel over dead!
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To lave in the wave,Majestic and chilly,Tomorrow I crave;But today it is silly.It is pleasant to look at the ocean;Tomorrow, perhaps, I shall swim in it.
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How pleasant to sit on the beach,On the beach, on the sand, in the sun,With ocean galore within reach,And nothing at all to be done!.
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Listen, buds, it's March twenty first;Don't you know enough to burst?Come on, birds, unlock your throats!Come on, gardeners, shed your coats!
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I hope of lightning our supply Will never be exhausted;You know it's lanterns in the skyFor angels who are losted.
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People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they really don't want it.
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Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy,You've had about seven hours' sleep since Friday,No wonder you feel that lost sensation;You're sunk from a riot of relaxation.
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A fig for embryo Lohengrins!I'll open all his safety pins,I'll pepper his powder, and salt his bottle,And give him readings from Aristotle.Sand for his spinach I'll gladly bring,And Tabasco sauce for his teething ring.Then perhaps he'll struggle through fire and waterTo marry somebody else's daughter.
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We love the kindly wind and hail,The jolly thunderbolt,We watch in glee the fairy trailOf ampere, watt, and volt.
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I think progress began to retrogress when Wilbur and Orville started tinkering around in Dayton and at Kitty Hawk, because I believe that two Wrights made a wrong.
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Man is a victim of dopeIn the incurable form of hope.
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These are enlightened days in which you can get hot water and cold water out of the same spigot,And everybody has something about which they are proud to be broad-minded but they also have other things about which you would be wasting your breath if you tried to convince them that they were a bigot.
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There has been a lot of progress during my lifetime, but I'm afraid it's heading in the wrong direction.
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Indoors or out, no one relaxesIn March, that month of wind and taxes,The wind will presently disappear,The taxes last us all the year.
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Life has a tendency to obfuscate and bewilder,Such as fating us to spend the first part of our livesbeing embarrassed by our parents and the last partbeing embarrassed by our childer.
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It is common knowledge to every schoolboy and even every Bachelor of Arts,That all sin is divided into two parts.One kind of sin is called a sin of commission, and that is very important And it is what you are doing when you are doing something you oughtn't...