Bill Bailey (Mark Robert Bailey) Quotes
Three women walk into a pub and say, `Hooray, we've colonised a male-dominated joke format'
Quotes to Explore
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I came to America to become an architect. And somewhere along the line while I was still in school, I was lured into theater, and that's how I became interested in theater. My first play was something called 'A Banquet for the Moon.' It was a weird play.
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I represent what I think is a traditional Republican... a limited government, fiscal responsibility, strong national defense, individual freedom and liberty.
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In 10 months, I was replaced from three films. That's when I realised I need to take my work seriously. It's a blessing I didn't get things easy. If I had, I wouldn't realise the value of success.
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You can't keep doing the same things when you get married and have a family. You have to slow down. You have to be responsible.
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If I could, I would not do anything else. I'd just be in the studio for my whole life. I would never go to parties, events, and red carpets. I would rather just be in the studio for the whole time. I don't even care. Nobody has to know what I look like. I just want to make music.
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The mediocre golfer generally is one who is too lazy to play better.
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My most serious character flaw is that I don't deny myself much.
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I've been told throughout my career that I have good instincts, and the idea of discovery and development in terms of a new artist is so exciting to me. Being only 25 and in a position where I might be able to grant opportunities is really cool.
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The Trojan War without Homer was nothing more than a battle over trade routes.
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I always enjoy watching Republicans compliment Bill Clinton now, because at the time, I'm sure he didn't feel a lot of the love.
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I have three children and three dogs. You put them in a Prius, you know? People who have a Prius obviously have no life! No wife, no kids, no pets - there's no room in there for anything!
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The only kind of water that should fly through the air is rain.
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No disease is more dangerous than a bad husband, for if a woman catches that Pox, she'll languish from it her entire life.
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The mind is easily distracted; it loses its focus and becomes restless. If it is not directed positively, its power will be diffused.
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There are times when wisdom cannot be found in the chambers of parliament or the halls of academia but at the unpretentious setting of the kitchen table.
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The presence of others who see what we see and hear what we hear assures us of the reality of the world and ourselves.
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Too many lives go up in smoke - It's nice to laugh but don't be the joke.
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I curse in everyday life, but usually when I stub my toe. The topics I'm discussing, it's not necessary to curse. I found [cursing] is a sign that a joke is not finished or well-written.
