Brian Regan Quotes

The government will pay certain farmers to not grow corn. Wow. Where's my check? That'd be great. "Hey, what do you do for a living?" "Well, I don't grow corn. Get up at the crack of noon, make sure there's no corn growing. I'm gonna get up early tomorrow. And not plow. You know, we used to not grow tomatoes-but there's more money in not growing corn."

Brian Regan

• Funny
• Comedy
• Certain
• Tomorrow
• Farmers
• Checks
• Cracks
• Corn

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Quotes to Explore

• People think I look odd onstage. But the way I deal with being incredibly nervous is by concentrating really hard.

  

  Laura Marling
  • People
  • Think
  • Look

• I don't think anyone feels older. You have this infinity inside you that feels like it could go on forever.

  

  Venus Williams
  • Think
  • Forever
  • Inside

• If Monsieur X spent an eternity studying treatises on optics, he would never paint 'La Grande Jatte.'

  

  Felix Feneon
  • Never
  • Eternity
  • Studying

• When you have all these traces of trash moving around, you can ask yourself how can we make the system more efficient. Then we can make better decisions. And perhaps we will not throw away the plastic bottles that go every day to the dump.

  

  Carlo Ratti
  • Day
  • Moving
  • Yourself

• Yes, iD is a machine vision and sensor browser for the physical world. That's what we have been working on with Coca-Cola, Verizon, Bank of America and Disney to launch content when an image is recognised.

  

  Patrick Soon-Shiong
  • World
  • America
  • Vision

• I was born in the small town of Gorizia, Italy, on 31 March, 1934. My father was an electrical engineer at the local telephone company and my mother an elementary school teacher.

  

  Carlo Rubbia
  • School
  • Mother
  • Father

• If you're powerful, you are much more likely to be blind and deaf to signals from outside.

  

  Adam Michnik
  • Powerful
  • Blind
  • Deaf

• Whether you call my heart affectionate, or you call it womanish: I confess, that to my misfortune, it is soft.

  

  Ovid
  • Heart
  • You
  • Soft

• I can understand Communism, but not Socialism.

  

  Lajos Kossuth
  • I Can
  • Socialism
  • Communism

• I grew up listening to classic rock - the Kinks, Genesis, The Who, Pink Floyd.

  

  Ted Cruz
  • Up
  • Rock
  • Listening

• Our music has been an incredible gift to help us make a difference.

  

  Zac Brown Band
  • Music
  • Help
  • Gift

• The atomic bomb made the prospect of future war unendurable. It has led us up those last few steps to the mountain pass; and beyond there is a different country.

  

  J. Robert Oppenheimer
  • Up
  • Different
  • Country

• Canada definitely has a strong program in women's boxing, and we're showing that women are capable, not just men.

  Mandy Bujold
  • Men
  • Women
  • Strong

• I say 'no' to nothing, 'yes' to moderation. That's how I approach everything. No matter if it's candy or foie gras. When you have the real deal, you're satisfied with that one bite. I say go full throttle and call it a day.

  

  Carla Hall
  • Real
  • You
  • Day

• Jesus is still up in Heaven, thumbing through his Bible, going 'Where did I say build a water slide?'

  

  Sam Kinison
  • Up
  • Water
  • Jesus

• I see it every day: People trying to create a home that somebody else tells them they should have. I don't care if it's a magazine or a bossy friend - when somebody says, 'This is what's elegant, this is what's trendy,' if it doesn't represent you, you're not going to be happy.

  

  Nate Berkus
  • People
  • Trying
  • Home

• I believe in the stability of my country. I believe in unity.

  

  Najib Mikati
  • Believe
  • Country
  • Unity

• The obstinacy of cleverness and reason is nothing to the obstinacy of folly and inanity.

  

  Harriet Beecher Stowe
  • Reason
  • Nothing
  • Folly

• Growing up, I was told I could be anything I wanted to be. There were no limitations restraining me just because I was a girl. Then I joined the military.

  

  Martha McSally
  • Up
  • Girl
  • Growing

• In the last four years, I heard the same thing over and over again from people: 'We've had enough,' 'Our country is drifting,' 'We've lost our way.'

  

  Ted Yoho
  • People
  • Country
  • Lost

• I don't believe that anybody has come to a conclusion on why something is funny. It's funny because it's ridiculous and it's ridiculous for different reasons at different times.

  

  Jackie Mason
  • Believe
  • Different
  • Why

• I try to leave a light footprint. I'm involved with Global Green, which aims to educate people about sustainable building and the greening of schools. I try to be aware about the consumption of unnecessary things in a consumptive culture.

  

  Walton Goggins
  • People
  • Culture
  • Light

• Our clubs are continuously working collectively and individually to offer the fans, no matter where they are, an even better experience.

  

  Jordi Bertomeu
  • Experience
  • Fans
  • Clubs

• The government will pay certain farmers to not grow corn. Wow. Where's my check? That'd be great. "Hey, what do you do for a living?" "Well, I don't grow corn. Get up at the crack of noon, make sure there's no corn growing. I'm gonna get up early tomorrow. And not plow. You know, we used to not grow tomatoes-but there's more money in not growing corn."

  

  Brian Regan
  • Funny
  • Comedy
  • Certain