Zach Galifianakis Quotes
Did you ever wake up with an erection...and then you realize you're just in a massage chair at Brookstone? And you yell to the sales clerk 'I'll take it!'
Quotes to Explore
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I shouldn't say this, but I always love the sidekicks. I want to do a leading-lady role in a film - absolutely. But I find that a lot of times I get attracted to the sidekick role. They stand out a little more because they're quirkier, they're funnier, they're crazier.
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I think every job I do, I sort of look for the challenge in. I mean, that's why we do this job. It's not, you know, obviously not for the money or for the fame, it's for, I guess finding out more about yourself.
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I never desire to converse with a man who has written more than he has read.
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The Afro-American is not a bestial race.
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I think success is very hard work, so, you know, if you work hard and you have some success, you have to give up something.
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Berlin is in a state of transition. There are lots of people who don't stay here. They pass through. They might not 'clean up,' but they mature. It is a city where people spend a significant time in their lives, and then they move on.
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Tragedy is like strong acid - it dissolves away all but the very gold of truth.
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My mom is incredibly stylish, and she gets it from my grandmother. I feel like I can't live up to how chic they are as women. They are great role models for aging gracefully, and that's a thing that is very key that I try to always emulate.
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I'm in love with music, and I'm pregnant by it. It's like having twins. Or triplets. Or eight-lets!
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Skepticism is an important historical tool. It is the starting point of all revision of hitherto accepted history.
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Ending wars is very simple if you surrender.
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Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking.
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I am not that thrilled about the way our records sound anyway. Don't get me wrong, I work hard on them and I want them to sound fantastic but I'm happy to have another interpretation of them anyway.
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I am from Karnal, India.
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One should live between extravagance and meanness. Don't save money by starving your mind. It is false economy never to take a holiday, or never to spend money for an evening's amusement or for a useful book.
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Everyone asks me if I'm the princess or if my brothers beat me up. The younger ones I can deck pretty easily. With the older ones, it's harder.
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If you took ISIS' oil, that would not stop them. It's not their only source of revenue. It would be a setback, but it would not stop them.
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The tongue is the only tool that gets sharper with use.
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One day, I'll be listening to a bunch of Ray Charles, the next day it's nothing but Red Hot Chili Peppers. The next day it might be Tupac all day.
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Believe me, nobody likes to loaf more than me.
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For too long, our society has shrugged off bullying by labeling it a 'rite of passage' and by asking students to simply 'get over it.' Those attitudes need to change. Every day, students are bullied into silence and are afraid to speak up. Let's break this silence and end school bullying.
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Sin, also for those who don't have faith, exists when one goes against one's conscience. To listen to and obey it means, in fact, to decide in face of what is perceived as good or evil. And on this decision pivots the goodness or malice of our action.
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I think being successful in comedy is being funny and making jokes - anything beyond that is the icing on the cake.
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Did you ever wake up with an erection...and then you realize you're just in a massage chair at Brookstone? And you yell to the sales clerk 'I'll take it!'
