Chris Rock Quotes
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I'm never proper or careful, but I never curse in front of my mother, either.
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Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.
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There's some downsides to being famous, which are not even worth mentioning. But to combat the bad sides of being famous, you really should take advantage of the good sides. The good sides are, you can use that fame to get projects you might not normally get.
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It's like, hmm, there's people with $2000 weaves that could have bought health care with that weave money. They don't have insurance. People want what they want. And I guess that is a reason we have this big credit card problem and a lot of these foreclosures.
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Does having a wife and kids change your act? Yes, but only in the best way. It gives you weight and authority. It also makes you closer to the audience because the audience is married and has kids.
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No film critic's going to say it, but 'Madagascar 3' is better than 'The Artist.'
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I'll go back to comedy clubs when they get a real no-camera policy, the same way they did with smoking.
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I can't cook, but I have a nice book of menus... and I can plate and set the table.
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Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn't curse.
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When I hear people talk about juggling, or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy, because 'sacrifice' infers that there was something better to do than being with your children.
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I'm an independent, but I got to admit I lean Democratic.
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Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.
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School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.
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If you properly clean a room, it gets dirtier before it gets cleaner.