Funny Quotes
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Don't make being a girl or a victim part of your stand-up act. If you encounter sexism in the business, don't bring it on stage; it's not funny.
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If a movie makes it really big, they do the obvious thing, right? They make an amusement park ride out of it. ... The connection is obvious. You get off, "Man, that was just like the movie! Only the movie had a storyline and characters, and that was a little more like a roller coaster."
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Some really good things kind of swing both ways and I like to see people that can swing really, really, really sad and horrible and terrible and really, really, really beautiful and funny.
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It's funny because looking back at my first contest, I was 15 and surfing the Haleiwa contest wearing this tiny bikini. I remember not even thinking twice about wearing it - I just thought it was normal.
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Comedians, we're just people who whine. But we happen to be funny when we whine.
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I am not gonna say that a guy's looks make him have to try harder in any way. I don't believe that at all. I think if he is funny, smart and cool, he's all set. Looks are not very important to me.
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Me, as myself, I don't think I'm particularly funny. But I've noticed that people in my life always have found me amusing. Which, when I was little, really bothered me.
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It's a bit like school camp, shooting a film. Everyone's on heat. It's a strange energy. It's full of adrenalin. I funnel my excess energy in funny little ways. I do a lot of dancing in my trailer. I love music.
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Success is always less funny than failure.
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I think we're the only jokeless show on television. I mean really, we have no setups and no punch lines. It's not a joke show. There are funny lines and funny moments but again the comedy is born of the human experience and awkward pauses are a great part of what it is to be human.
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It's funny, the hardest thing to do is to make something look like it's fast, loose and improvised, and get somebody to laugh.
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A lot of times girls think they're funny, but they want to pretty at the same time, and if you want to be funny, you have to be willing to get ugly.
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I fear for the future of the planet. But in a funny way, I'm even sanguine about that.
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You know, he would go and look at different funny books because he wanted his character to be different and make different faces. I saw a funny book in his room and it looked like the same character he was playing. It was about a duck.
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Fate has it in for me to be an exhibit: that funny old lady from the telly.
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I wasn't very funny or flashy, I was kind of boring.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I'm just gonna tell her, 'Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they'll have to hire you, they can't really fire you, and you don't have to produce that much. It'll be awesome.'
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I have seen and heard comedians who had really funny 'stuff' but yet could not make the people laugh; then, again - I have seen others whose stuff was anything but humorous, and the audience would howl with laughter.
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My favorite type of pet has always been a dog. They're loyal, kind, and offer endless affection. My friend Eric says, 'The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.' Funny thought.
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I guess what I always found funny was the human condition.
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What I like best is a book that's at least funny once in a while. What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though.
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I always just wanted to be funny. I never really planned to be scary.
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If Pete Rose brings the Reds in first, they ought to bronze him and put him in cement.
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I actually think of being funny as an odd turn of mind, like a mild disability, some weird way of looking at the world that you can't get rid of.
