Charlie Brooker Quotes
-
Actually, I think this might be an Al-Qaeda recruitment film.
-
Online, you play at being yourself.
-
I've got no attention span.
-
I've never lost that freelance mentality. You can't take a holiday because you're worried the work will dry up.
-
If I ran a national burger franchise - which I don't - I'd make it a rule that no two customers can be greeted with precisely the same words and that every third customer must be grossly insulted as a matter of course. Just to keep the atmosphere nice and lively. And to keep the staff laughing.
-
I liked 'Making A Murderer,' 'Master of None.' 'Stranger Things' I watched along with everyone else in the world. 'Narcos,' I really liked 'Narcos' a lot.
-
I never really thought of myself as a TV critic. I was presenting TV before I was writing about it.
-
Don't accuse anyone with the temerity to question your sad supernatural fantasies of having a 'closed mind' or being 'blind to possibilities'. A closed mind asks no questions, unthinkingly accepting that which it wants to believe. The blindness is all yours.'16
-
I'm quite hardcore on this. I think every psychic and medium in this country belongs in prison. Even the ones demented enough to believe in what they're doing. In fact, especially them. Give them windowless cells and make them crap in buckets.
-
I do think that it's a dysfunctional relationship between columnists and commentators, because they both seem to hate each other, like a terrible marriage.
-
Tinder is the ultimate gamification of romance. It's 'Pokemon Go' for the heart.
-
Online, you're trying to appeal to everyone and people who you don't know at the same time. So I think, as a side effect, it amplifies the desire for groupthink.
-
My brain knows best-before dates are a con; my panicky gut treats them like a nuclear countdown.
-
I have often felt the worlds of social media and the Internet are like a weird dreamscape. Even physically, when you are looking at your phone, you are out of it.
-
Like bankers, top footballers are massively overpaid, but at least you comprehend what they're doing for the money.
-
Brexit is a harbinger for Trump, really.
-
The sole purpose of a crown is to make anyone not wearing one feel like an insignificant pauper. They're obscene to the point of satire.
-
Technology is a tool that has allowed us to swipe around like an angry toddler.
-
Apple excels at taking existing concepts - computers, MP3 players, conceit - and carefully streamlining them into glistening ergonomic chunks of concentrated aspiration.
-
Everyone's opened a drawer and been startled by the unexpected discovery of an old mobile phone that now resembles an outsized pantomime prop. To think you used to be impressed by this clunky breezeblock. You were like a caveman gawping at a yo-yo.
-
I've scaled back my involvement with Twitter; it's too easy to get dragged into an argument.
-
Rather than setting yourself a New Year's resolution, why not simply pick a reason for hating yourself for the next 365 days? Takes less time, and it's easier to stick to.