Chelsea Handler Quotes
My relationship with my father had been on the proverbial fritz since the time I was fifteen and called the police to report him for child molesting. He had never molested me, but I wanted to have a party that weekend and needed him out of the house.

Quotes to Explore
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I owe the public a good performance, the best I can give. We really bust our chops on 'CHiPs' but when I go home and get a weekend off, I want to spend it quietly, with my lady.
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I get offers all the time from film makers, but they are unknown quantities. I don't go there and do experiments.
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It takes me a long time writing books. It takes me about five years to write a book, and when I'm done, the last thing I want to do is to do it again.
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The last time I had to make a career decision, I was 17. I could have gone to Ballet Theatre or National Ballet of Canada. There were options. But as I became exposed to the Robbins repertoire, I realized that there was a living genius in the house.
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I actually spend very little time listening to any new music.
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Music is the best means we have of digesting time.
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I was in chains all the time, 24 hours a day, for three years. I tried to wear those chains with dignity, even if I felt that it was unbearable.
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We are passing through a very sensitive time, and on the whole, this country is facing very big problems.
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Akshay Kumar is a senior in the industry, and I consider myself lucky to be working with him. Each film of his opens to a packed house. Today, a film will sell only if you have a story. The audience is smart and won't be taken for a ride. And I'm confident about my movies.
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But sadly, one of the problems with being on public radio is that people tend to think you're being sincere all the time.
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We tried to approach this as though there's never been a Superman movie before, but at the same time respecting the canon and mythology. There are the pillars that you have to respect, and I'm not about to break them. But it is fun for me to bend them and mess with them.
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Whenever our neighbour's house is on fire, it cannot be amiss for the engines to play a little on our own.
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Among all the upheavals of war with al Qaeda, the surest indicator of the historic stakes is the ongoing rotation of top U.S. government managers - scores at a time - into a bunker deep underground and far from Washington.
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I think by the time I was born, my parents had pretty well run the gauntlet with their kids. The novelty had kind of worn off by the time the twelfth child was born. I was lucky to get fed and changed, picked up and taken to school.
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In Japan, full-time homemakers have no economic power of their own, and they socially lead a faceless, anonymous existence.
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When it was time for a player to go, he went.
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I'm not registered to any party. I don't really play in the political world. I'm really more interested in getting things done.
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In every battle there comes a time when both sides consider themselves beaten, then he who continues the attack wins.
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The supporting powers of time air and of the wind depend on the shape of the surfaces used, and the best forms can only be evolved by free flight through the air.
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He is our Father - the Father of our Spirits, and was once a man in mortal flesh as we are, and is now an exalted being.
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You learn so much about yourself as an artist. I never would have thought that I could sing every night, you know? Travel and perform every single night, and travel to another city the next day and do it all over again? You learn a lot of new things about yourself, and you make a lot of connections with people.
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String theory is extremely attractive because gravity is forced upon us. All known consistent string theories include gravity, so while gravity is impossible in quantum field theory as we have known it, it is obligatory in string theory.
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The man who wins out and survives does so only because of superior science and strategy.
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My relationship with my father had been on the proverbial fritz since the time I was fifteen and called the police to report him for child molesting. He had never molested me, but I wanted to have a party that weekend and needed him out of the house.