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Harold Ramis and I together did the ‘National Lampoon Show’ off Broadway, ‘Meatballs,’ ‘Stripes,’ ‘Caddyshack,’ ‘Ghostbusters’ and ‘Groundhog Day.’ He earned his keep on this planet. God bless him.
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Totie Fields is one of my benchmarks for a lot of things. There was a standard of show business.
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If you have a good script, that's what gets you involved. It's harder to write a good screenplay than to find something.
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When I was a little kid playing baseball, my manager called me Sleepy. And only a few people, who know me from way, way back, call me that still. I used to drift off and that's why they made me the catcher, so I wouldn't fall asleep. That gift I have still.
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I've never made any horrible, horrible movies. If you don't ruin your reputation, you can always get work.
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You work, you get paid, you drink.
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I'm just an obnoxious guy who can make it appear charming, that's what they pay me to do.
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I think that the online world has actually brought books back. People are reading because they're reading the damn screen. That's more reading than people used to do.
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I have a brother who gives socks for Christmas. He gives socks. Every year, I get a pair of socks from him.
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I kinda like this Jay-Z thing, where he’s retired, but he keeps doing shows. I think I beat him to that. If you say you’re retired, people don’t bother you so much, and then if you want to do something, you can do it.
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We're creating a TV show of Scrooge, starring Jamie Farr, with Buddy Hackett as Scrooge. We're shooting in this Victorian set for weeks, and Hackett is pissed all the time, angry that he's not the center of attention, and finally we get to the scene where we've gotta shoot him at the window, saying, "Go get my boots," or whatever. The set is stocked with Victorian extras and little children in Oliver kind of outfits, and the director says, "All right, Bud - just give it whatever you want." And Hackett goes off on a rant. Unbelievably obscene.
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I will be in Orlando during the atheist convention to do my best to counter the assaults upon Christ of the atheists. I also plan on running a large newspaper ad in the Orlando Sentinel addressed to the atheists and warning the Orlando area of the atheists' vile plans for their children.
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If you walk up to some random person on the street, grab them by the shoulder, and say 'Did you just see what I saw?!', you'll find that no-one wants to talk to you.
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And I don't like to work. I only like working when I'm working.
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You have to be as light as you can be and not get weighed down and stuck in your emotion, stuck in your body, stuck in your head. You just want to always be trying to elevate somehow.
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You're supposed to have one hand up and one hand down. As you're trying to going up, you're trying to pull someone up at the same time.
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Life is a game, and it's much more fun if you play it as your own game, so stay light and loose and relaxed.
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I feel like I'm a better person when I'm quieter.
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We're Americans! Do you know what that means? It means our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country in the world.
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I don't really read the reviews, but I remember one a long time ago I read that said that I had a face like a potato.
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Human sacrifice! Dogs and cats living together! Mass hysteria!
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The first year I had money, I really went shopping. I got really caught up in it. I bought all my brothers sets of luggage, and I bought 'em winter coats from Giorgio Armani - winter coats. And I got a pair of socks from this brother.
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You can handle just about anything that comes at you out on the road with a believable grin, common sense and whiskey.
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You know the theory of cell irritability? If you take an amoeba cell and poke it a thousand times, it will change and then re-form into its original shape. And then, the thousandth time you poke this amoeba, the cell will completely collapse and become nothing. That's kind of what it's like being famous. People say hi, how are you doing, and after the thousandth time, you just get angry; you really pop.