Kurt Vonnegut Quotes
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When a man becomes a writer, I think he takes on a sacred obligation to produce beauty and enlightenment and comfort at top speed.
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Beware of the man who works hard to learn something, learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before.
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I am of course notoriously hooked on cigarettes. I keep hoping the things will kill me. A fire at one end and a fool at the other.
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The year was 2081, and everyone was finally equal.
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Old Norwegian Proverb: Swedes have short dicks but long memories.
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Still and all, why bother? Here's my answer. Many people need desperately to receive this message: I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people do not care about them. You are not alone.
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There is a riddle about a man who is locked in a room with nothing but a bed and a calendar, and the question is: How does he survive?The answer is: He eats dates from the calendar and drinks water from the springs of the bed.
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Beer, of course, is actually a depressant. But poor people will never stop hoping otherwise.
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It may be that the most striking thing about members of my literary generation in retrospect will be that we were allowed to say absolutely anything without fear of punishment.
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I really wonder what gives us the right to wreck this poor planet of ours.
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America's soldiers are being treated … like toys a rich kid got for Christmas.
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People don't come to church for preachments, of course, but to daydream about God.
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Like most science-fiction writers, Trout knew almost nothing about science.
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Charm was a scheme for making strangers like and trust a person immediately, no matter what the charmer had in mind.
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About astrology and palmistry: they are good because they make people vivid and full of possibilities. They are communism at its best. Everybody has a birthday and almost everybody has a palm.
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To bethe eyesand earsand conscienceof the Creator of the Universe,you fool.
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Is it possible that seemingly incredible geniuses like Bach and Shakespeare and Einstein were not in fact superhuman, but simply plagiarists, copying great stuff from the future?
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He alienated his friends in the sciences by thanking them extravagantly for scientific advances he had read about in the recent newspapers and magazines, by assuring them, with a perfectly straight face, that life was getting better and better, thanks to scientific thinking.
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Maybe God has let everybody who ever lived be reborn - so he or she can see how it ends. Even Pitecanthropus erectus and Australopithecus and Sinanthropus pekensis and the Neanderthalers are back on Earth - to see how it ends. They're all on Times Square - making change for peepshows. Or recruiting Marines.
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You were sick, but now you're well, and there's work to do.
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If you want to take my guns away from me, and you’re all for murdering fetuses, and love it when homosexuals marry each other, and want to give them kitchen appliances at their showers, and you’re for the poor, you’re a liberal. If you are against those perversions and for the rich, you’re a conservative. What could be simpler?
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I was taught that the human brain was the crowning glory of evolution so far, but I think it's a very poor scheme for survival.
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He held up his watch to sunlight, letting it drink in the wherewithal that was to solar watches what money was to Earth men.
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I'm screamingly funny, you know, I really am in the books. And that helps because I'm funnier than a lot of people, I think, and that's appreciated by young people.