Kurt Vonnegut Quotes
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I now make my living by being impolite. I am clumsy at it.
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Beware of the man who works hard to learn something, learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before.
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And I believe that reading and writing are the most nourishing forms of meditation anyone has so far found. By reading the writings of the most interesting minds in history, we meditate with our own minds and theirs as well. This to me is a miracle.
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If people think nature is their friend, then they sure don't need an enemy.
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We are healthy only to the extent that our ideas are humane.
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If God were alive today, he would have to be an atheist, because the excrement has hit the air-conditioning big time, big time.
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Charm was a scheme for making strangers like and trust a person immediately, no matter what the charmer had in mind.
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'During my next visit with you, fellow-believers,' he said, 'I shall tell you a parable about people who do things that they think God Almighty wants done. In the meanwhile, you would do well, for background on this parable, to read everything that you can lay your hands on about the Spanish Inquisition.'
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What do men want? They want a lot of pals, and they wish that people wouldn’t get so mad at them.
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I really wonder what gives us the right to wreck this poor planet of ours.
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Do you think Arabs are dumb? They gave us our numbers. Try doing long division with Roman numerals.
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Humor is a way of holding off how awful life can be.
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To bethe eyesand earsand conscienceof the Creator of the Universe,you fool.
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He held up his watch to sunlight, letting it drink in the wherewithal that was to solar watches what money was to Earth men.
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The new heroism - put a village idiot into a pressure cooker, seal it up tight, and shoot him at the moon.
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The sermon was based on what he claimed was a well-known fact, that there were no Atheists in foxholes. I asked Jack what he thought of the sermon afterwards, and he said, 'There's a Chaplain who never visited the front.'
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The most important message of a crucifix, to me anyway, was how unspeakably cruel supposedly sane human beings can be when under orders from a superior authority.
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Beer, of course, is actually a depressant. But poor people will never stop hoping otherwise.
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I had no talent for science. What was infinitely worse: all my fraternity brothers were engineers.
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I don't know about you, but I practice a disorganized religion. I belong to an unholy disorder. We call ourselves 'Our Lady of Perpetual Astonishment.'
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You were sick, but now you're well, and there's work to do.
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I think big business is a terrible thing for the spirit of the country, as our spirit is the best thing about us.
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It may be that the most striking thing about members of my literary generation in retrospect will be that we were allowed to say absolutely anything without fear of punishment.
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I was not an anthropology student prior to the war. I took it up as part of a personal readjustment following some bewildering experiences as an infantryman and later as a prisoner of war in Dresden, Germany. The science of the Study of Man has been extremely satisfactory from that personal standpoint.