Billy Crystal Quotes
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Nothing takes the sting out of these tough economic times like watching a bunch of millionaires giving golden statues to each other.
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My grandparents invented joylessness. They were not fun. I've already had more fun with my grandchildren than my grandparents ever had with me.
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I think it's like a relay race. You run, and you hand over the baton, and your kids pick it up. They take the stuff they want, throw the rest away, and keep running. That's what life is about.
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Only once in a thousand years or so do we get to hear a Mozart or see a Picasso or read a Shakespeare. Ali was one of them, and yet at his heart, he was still a kid from Louisville who ran with the gods and walked with the crippled and smiled at the foolishness of it all.
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It's like being a gym rat, but you're a theater rat, and then that becomes your fraternity house. That becomes your extended family.
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I don't go to any of the big Academy parties while the show is on because, invariably, it turns to people watching me watch the host, and it's not comfortable. I watch at home and hope the show gets to be really good.
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Losing my parents, who I admired, loved and needed, it took a long time to be able to move on.
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Change is such hard work.
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I think I've far exceeded what I ever thought I could possibly do.
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Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I'd always go off book and start improvising.
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I've worn down America.
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As I sit here writing and look across the room at Janice, I keep thinking of the most heartbreaking question: which of us will go first?
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Our professor was Marty Scorsese. Marty was a graduate student, or Mr. Scorsese, which is what I had to call him, and still do when I see him 'cause he gave me a C.
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We're seeing this disintegration of the family movie into these blockbuster things that kids should not be exposed to with explosions, carnage and violence.
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Bambi, to a kid, was scary.
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My dad died when I was 15 and worked way too much.
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President Clinton knew the course and goes, 'Here's what you want to do here.' By the fourth hole, you wanted to hit him with your putter.
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I was raised mostly by my mom.
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'Parental Guidance' combines comedy and pathos in the best way.
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Dad had a music store, and he'd often bring home comedy albums that I would listen to. I started listening to Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby, and developing taste. They really influenced my style of comedy.
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I love Mickey Mantle. Would I have felt the same if I had known when I was eight years old what I know now?
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I have performed my one-man show '700 Sundays' over 400 times now. There were only two times that I can honestly say I was nervous. The first was when I knew Mel Brooks was in the audience, and the second was when Sid Caesar came.
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When you're 65, you're surprised by what turns you on.
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A laugh is a weird sound, and when you get a couple thousand people making it at once, it's really strange. But when I can feel proud of myself for causing it, it's great.