-
I want you to take away the hope because that's the thing that's killing me.
-
My dad was very much a John Wayne kind of guy, but he was also a great guy, great sense of humor, a real dedicated dad. I don't think he ever missed a hockey game I was in.
-
Racism isn't born, folks, it's taught. I have a two-year-old son. You know what he hates? Naps! End of list.
-
I fell asleep during 'Year One' twice. And my son, who never falls asleep during a Jack Black movie, also nodded off. That's how bad it was. I was incredibly disappointed.
-
I don't really have a lot of fun playing just straight good guys. It's not my thing. It's like Tom Hanks territory.
-
I'm a lapsed Catholic in the best sense of the word.
-
I'm high as a kite and my teeth are green, merry fucking Christmas!
-
There's no male Oprah.
-
I've eaten things that didn't complain this much.
-
When I was doing standup, I always wanted to get out of the standup world and take it back into the theatrical world, like with 'No Cure For Cancer.'
-
I'm pretty much a chocolate guy. I'm up for any type of chocolate. Any chocolate.
-
I'd love to do another television series. I really love the writing process, and as an actor I really like how much you get to examine in television.
-
You try to - you want to fly on both sides of the political fence because that's where the - where the comedy is.
-
The people you would have overdose on drugs never would. Like Mötley Crüe would never fucking overdose, man, never. You could put them in a room with two tons of crack, they'd come out half an hour later, goin 'ROCK ON MAN!'
-
We live in a country where John Lennon takes eight bullets, Yoko Ono is walking right beside him and not one hits her. Explain that to me!
-
My father could swear in Gaelic and English, by the way, ladies and gentlemen.
-
I spent a long time working in the movies to figure out that kind of acting and also how to write and produce for the screen.
-
What's politically correct a lot of times is not funny.
-
Usually when you watch a film, you're just sort of biting your nails about things you could have done differently.
-
Firefighters don't go on strike.
-
Bill Murray doesn't do anything. He barely shows up at the movies he says he's going to do.
-
When I was a teenager, you couldn't get straight pants. Then in '76, when punk started to hit, it was a revelation that you could find straight pants again.
-
I'm no day at the beach. And if it is a beach, it's Hampton Beach. Ever been there? It's not nice.
-
Some people expect me to be funny all the time, and I'm not necessarily funny all the time.