Don Rickles Quotes
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I couldn't sell air conditioners on a 98-degree day. When I demonstrated them in a showroom, I pushed the wrong button and blew the circuit.
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My life was in Montreal years ago. Best food in the world.
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Eddie Fisher married to Elizabeth Taylor is like me trying to wash the Empire State Building with a bar of soap.
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My wife is great. She always goes to the bank to see if the check has cleared.
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I told jokes badly.
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I still have drive, but everything is relative.
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I have no idea what I'm going to say when I stand up to give a toast. But I do know that anything I say I find funny.
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I was always the guy - out of insecurities, I was always making fun, even as a kid.
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Las Vegas is the boiling pot of entertainment.
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Diana Krall I met in, I think it was Canada. She's a lovely lady. Her husband, Elvis Costello, is a great star.
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You lose your energy, you lose that excitement and it gets the audience up.
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I was in World War II; I cried when they took me in the Navy. That's the last time I cried.
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I exaggerate all our selves, our beings. I make fun of everything: of our life and what we are. But I don't tell jokes, really. I just exaggerate life, and it comes out funny.
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I don't drink much anymore, but when I traveled with Frank Sinatra, God rest his soul, I used to drink like I could do it. He made it a test. In Vegas, the Rat Pack, which I was a little part of, drank all night and slept most of the day. Then, about 5 o'clock, we'd meet in the hotel steam room, lock the door, and steam our brains out.
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I don't have regrets. I've never sat here and thought, 'Gee, if only I'd done 'The Man Who Came to Dinner' on Broadway, I would have been happier.'
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You've got to be able to sell yourself.
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I have my own gym. When you do jokes and they sell, you get a gym.
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Johnny Carson was king of the kings, in my opinion.
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You know what's funny to me? Attitude.
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Bob Hope was totally regimented. I go in and say a line like, 'Hi Bob' and I'd have to do it five times, and then Bob would take me to the writers to say the line different ways. He wouldn't let me ad-lib.
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My wife came into my life, and my mother still wanted to be the boss.
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I was nice to the people in the Philippines for the two and a half years I was there, because I knew eventually I'd have to kiss up to them so my grandchildren could have toys.
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The man I adored, and miss him terribly, was Johnny Carson.
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When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.