Mallory Ortberg Quotes
Did you know that, pound for pound, the moose is the leanest ruminant on Earth? It's true. Moose are very in tune with their natural surroundings.

Quotes to Explore
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I adored my mom. I thought she was the best. I loved her very much.
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Nothing truly convincing - which would possess thoroughness, vigor, and skill - has been written against the ancients as yet; especially not against their poetry.
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Second place is just the first place loser.
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I write better in Cape Breton... too many people around in Ontario. Down there I meet all sorts of non-human people, but they don't bother me, and I don't feel I have to apologize on behalf of my species quite so often.
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I'm not a leading man.
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I want to be able to make people laugh and cry and feel happy or sad and feel all these different emotions through singing and acting. Hopefully throughout my career, I'll get to pursue them.
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'RoboCop,' when that came out, was like the best comic book movie ever, and it's not based on a comic book.
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I'm not one to take revenge. If someone does something wrong to me I leave it in the hands of the universe to take care of that person.
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The mob spirit has grown with the increasing intelligence of the Afro-American.
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Life is not about dwelling on the bad.
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It must be a balance in everything we do, not too much of everything, keep it simple, not complicated.
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In the beginning, there was silence. And out of the silence came the sound. The sound is not here.
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I'm very independent, creatively, always trying to push myself - and I think that comes from my mother.
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I am opposed to the military use of animals. I am also opposed to the military use of men.
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Teaching can be learning, especially if student curiosity with the question 'What's going on here?' can be elicited.
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I tried the broadcasting thing, the coaching thing, but I'll never replace the competitive feeling of being out on the field when we were players.
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I used to do school plays. I never really took any acting classes. I'm just a natural ham, I guess.
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...I mean to say, when a girl, offered a good man’s heart, laughs like a bursting paper bag and tells him not to be a silly ass, the good man is entitled, I think, to assume that the whole thing is off.
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To say America can have strong leadership without strong character is to say we can get water without the wet.
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What can you know about life at 14? I have learned a lot since, but you learn slowly. You get hit by many things and try to make sense of it.
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I believe the people of the U.S. are peace-loving people.
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Fashion is always uncomfortable. When you get comfortable, you never get the look.
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Did you know that, pound for pound, the moose is the leanest ruminant on Earth? It's true. Moose are very in tune with their natural surroundings.