Jerry Lewis Quotes
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I tell young comics, 'Do you want this badly enough? It's there. But you have to go get it. And if you think I'm going to give you the key to the lock of that door, there is no key, there is no lock, and there is no door.'
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I think the cartoons that they're children are watching, particularly 'The Simpsons,' they're OK. I think that the adult audience is making much too much of the danger that they imply. That's not the case. The danger for children today, honey, is the news. Keep them away from news on television.
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The greatest thing I can remember in my whole career was the Ringling Brothers & Barnum and Bailey clowns asking me to appear with them at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles in 1965.
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Every day is another something that comes along.
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I don't talk about anything negative.
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A woman doing comedy doesn't offend me, but sets me back a bit. I, as a viewer, have trouble with it. I think of her as a producing machine that brings babies in the world.
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Seeing a woman project the kind of aggression that you have to project as a comic just rubs me wrong.
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I have always said that I cannot allow the child within me to die. It's kept me alive.
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Pity? You don't want to be pitied because you're a cripple in a wheelchair? Stay in your house!
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A wonderful thing happens over time. You fall in love with the sound of your own voice.
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I have some very personal feelings about politics, but I don't get into it because I do comedy already.
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My ego and my vanities have nothing to do with comedy.
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I never got a formal education. So my intellect is my common sense. I don't have anything else going for me. And my common sense opens the door to instinct.
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Going unnoticed has never been my strong suit.
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I got the 'Max Rose' script, and I fell in love with it. It just hit me. It was something that needed to be made.
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I've raised my boys the old-fashioned way, with spankings, sending them upstairs if they misbehave at parties, the works. I believe discipline is the proof of love.
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I've had great success being a total idiot.
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I was once six feet tall, but at 85, I'm now five feet four.
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I don't like any female comedians.
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Love is what makes you dream, and love is what makes you want to get up in the morning. Love is something that you want to be a part of because it makes you better.
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I turned down 'Some Like It Hot.' See how smart I am? I felt I couldn't bring anything funny to it. The outfit was funny. I don't need to compete with the wardrobe.
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Commercial television has underestimated the intelligence of the public.
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I really am opinionated, but not for long. I have found myself coming off of what I think of something because the guy I'm talking to makes better sense than I am. I have so many points of view, I can't keep track of 'em, because I talk to too many people... I'm not so opinionated that I won't budge.
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My Judaism has always been a great pride with me.