Jim Gaffigan Quotes
There were times in my life when I had one thing to do all day, but I still couldn’t get to it. “I gotta go to the post office, but I’d probably have to put on pants. And they’re only open till five. Looks like I’m going to have to do that next week.
Jim Gaffigan
Quotes to Explore
This is what we get paid to do, is to bring it every week, and I hope the guys would say I bring it every week. I mean, I love this game, and I bring energy.
Aaron Rodgers
Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
H. L. Mencken
But I think funny and talent will always win out; I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that.
Wanda Sykes
It's funny - I read that women look to chiseled-faced guys for one-night stands, and to round-faced guys for marriage. When I'm rounder in the face, I like to say, 'This is my long-term look.' Or 'This is my wife-and-kids look right here.'
Garrett Hedlund
Humor has to surprise us; otherwise, it isn't funny. It's a death knell for a writer to be labeled a humorist because then it's not a surprise anymore.
Garrison Keillor
In my flat in Chicago, I've got this big room with an office in the corner and a balcony so I can watch people go by.
Irvine Welsh
Don’t you worry there, my honey. We might not have any money. But we’ve got our love to pay the bills. Maybe I think you’re cute and funny. Maybe I wanna do what bunnies do with you, if you know what I mean?
Ingrid Michaelson
Humor is a great way to relieve stress.
Christina Maslach
Nations, like stars, are entitled to eclipse. All is well, provided the light returns and the eclipse does not become endless night. Dawn and resurrection are synonymous. The reappearance of the light is the same as the survival of the soul.
Victor Hugo
Eternal love is a myth, but we make our myths, and we love them to death.
Natalie Angier
I respond very well to well-written material and women who have had an effect on society, something tragic or monumental has happened to them.
Samantha Morton
There were times in my life when I had one thing to do all day, but I still couldn’t get to it. “I gotta go to the post office, but I’d probably have to put on pants. And they’re only open till five. Looks like I’m going to have to do that next week.
Jim Gaffigan
