Jim Gaffigan Quotes
It's difficult to parent one kid, let alone five! It's insane. It's this strange, overwhelming mess that I would not trade for anything. I think it's more difficult in New York City. It's not like we can hop in the minivan and go somewhere. I don't own a car. It's chaos anywhere. Being a parent is difficult. Being a son and a daughter is difficult. It's a human relationship.

Quotes to Explore
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The sole ultimate factor in human decisions is physical force. This we must learn, however repugnant the idea may seem, if we are to protect ourselves and our institutions. Reliance on anything else is fallacious and ruinous.
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Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.
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White actors still get way more money in Hollywood. It's been that way for a very long time. I hope it'll change, but it's a matter of forcing that change.
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The man whose life is devoted to paperwork has lost the initiative. He is dealing with things that are brought to his notice, having ceased to notice anything for himself.
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Here in France, I've seen some very good young designers, but they don't have this ability to be good businessmen, too. I think America gives you this.
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That was one of those moments where I felt so confident. I played three matches in the same day.
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What I'm interested in is the fascinating image of young leaders... you know, young people leading in different fields. You see athletes and people in gymnastics, where the requirement is that you are supple and very, very young... 11... and by the time you're 14, you're already over the hill.
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If you can live in Vegas, or visit Vegas, and leave in one piece, still loving it and somehow laughing about it, you should spend at least part of your last night in town doing something that will serve you well no matter where you go next: thank your lucky stars.
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It's incredible what happens when you explain to kids what good food is - they get so excited! They go home and tell their parents... and they're excited to cook the recipes themselves in class.
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One of the goals of the Feminist Elite is to reinforce to women the idea that men are obsolete.
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I already had high blood pressure. I have hypertension. And I think the chemo was just too much for my kidneys. And they went into failure. And that was September 12th of 2008. And the doctor rushed me right to the hospital.
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I think it's difficult to do fashion for men, because either you become very over-homosexual fashion or very boring fashion. You don't want a boy who looks 15 in a little pair of shorts with some strange art... But to see just a jacket and tie is boring.
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Most of the time, economic data is fairly benign. I don't wish to imply it is meaningless, but it is not a driver of stock markets. Indeed, the correlation between economic noise and how equity markets perform has been wildly overemphasized.
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Probably I understand very much the people who rise against injustice.
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I've always considered myself a filmmaker who writes stuff for himself to do.
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When I was 13, I thought I was pretty hot stuff because I knew BASIC programming, self-taught on the family's Commodore 64. One of my crowning accomplishments was writing a silly little program that showed a crudely-drawn Space Shuttle lifting off in a cloud of pixelated smoke.
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We were like a stock company at Warners. We didn't know any of the stars from the other studios.
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There are those who seem to feel they have no choice about being jerks in the present because they had a crappy childhood. Well, that's the definition of childhood; nobody gets out alive. You either get stronger from what you experience, or you turn it into a crutch, an excuse, a dodge.
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Getting dressed, for me, is like a window to my soul.
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The truth is, I think we are a self-less society, not a selfish society. Because we're so busy now.
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It seems to me that whether it is recognized or not, there is a terrific frustration which increases in intensity and harmfulness as time goes on, when people are always daydreaming of the kind of place in which they would like to live, yet never making the place where they do live into anything artistically satisfying to them. Always to dream of a cottage by a brook while never doing anything to the stuffy house in the city is to waste creativity in this very basic area, and to hinder future creativity by not allowing it to grow and develop through use.
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Mozambique is having an economic resurgence but still four out of 10 people there have HIV or AIDS...There's astounding conditions but what I was left with...was the power of the human spirit there and the fact these people have been through so much and they were still dancing in the streets.
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Men are cowards before women until they become tyrants.
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It's difficult to parent one kid, let alone five! It's insane. It's this strange, overwhelming mess that I would not trade for anything. I think it's more difficult in New York City. It's not like we can hop in the minivan and go somewhere. I don't own a car. It's chaos anywhere. Being a parent is difficult. Being a son and a daughter is difficult. It's a human relationship.