Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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I talk every day about doing the right thing.
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We all sit in front of our mics and our scripts lay on music stands. Then the silliness begins!
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A sack is way better than any nightclub. A touchdown is way better than any bar experience I've ever had.
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With a gentleman I am always a gentleman and a half, and with a fraud I try to be a fraud and a half.
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You've just got to sing, do some kind of singing every day. Early mornings and cold weather can mess with that. I drink special teas with cayenne pepper, but I think you're psyching yourself out, really.
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I am not an American; I am the American.
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I'm not really a fan of Valentine's Day. I think it can be romantic doing nothing on Valentine's Day. It's more romantic than being given a big bunch of flowers that everyone else is doing.
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I never made a mistake in grammar but one in my life and as soon as I done it I seen it.
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When I was in the private sector, I found it immensely useful to go out and talk to customers and co-workers.
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Some films shouldn't be remade.
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All of the characters in my films, they share one commonality. It doesn't matter whether they are good or bad, it doesn't matter whether they are smart or stupid, these characters all take responsibility for their own behavior. I'm much the same.
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If the colonists hadn't rejected British militarism and the massive financial burden of maintaining the British military, America wouldn't exist.
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Dick Durbin's a worthy opponent on any debate. He's very intelligent, quick. Knows his facts and puts them forward well.
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Last year the National Sorry Day Committee consulted with stolen generations people in every State and Territory, and concluded that programmes set up in response to the Bringing Them Home Report are reaching only a small fraction of those they are intended to help.
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There are still traces of discrimination against race and gender, but it's a lot different than when I started out. It just comes quietly, slowly, sometimes so quietly that you don't realize it until you start looking back.
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I'm thrilled to be joining Gap Inc., a company that understands the importance of integrating technology and retail in ways that improve the lives of its customers.
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Adversity has ever been considered the state in which a man most easily becomes acquainted with himself.
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Names, once they are in common use, quickly become mere sounds, their etymology being buried, like so many of the earth's marvels, beneath the dust of habit.
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My life is a series of things that just happen.
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Overall, you know, no state in our country has been hurt more by the eight years of Barack Obama than Wyoming has been, and whether it's the absolutely unconstitutional role that the EPA is playing and the president trying to kill our coal industry - Wyoming is the nation's largest coal-producing state. So when President Obama and Hillary Clinton say they're gonna put coal out of business, it hits us harder than just about anyplace else.
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I've never met a popcorn ball I didn't like.
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The curtains would open and it would be just her standing in some ludicrous pose, like Aphrodite.
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I don't believe you should stay onstage until people are begging you to get off. I like the idea of leaving them wanting a bit more.
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I'm there to make people laugh. I'm not trying to come across as sexy.
