John Oliver Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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When I was on 'Trauma,' the first order was six, which turned to 12, and then there were rumors of getting cancelled. I'm used to that.
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I think I have a passion for playing the game. I love to play, and I want to play at a high level. You have to do the right things in order to continue at that level.
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It's a very violent game, and bodies take a beating, so you want to make sure you do everything you can to get your body back. It's just something you have to do.
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My mother left me for seven years in an orphanage.
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Never respect men merely for their riches, but rather for their philanthropy; we do not value the sun for its height, but for its use.
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My audience was my life. What I did and how I did it, was all for my audience.
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The truth is, bad things don't affect us as profoundly as we expect them to. That's true of good things, too. We adapt very quickly to either.
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The Mormon issue is a real problem in the South; it's a real problem in other parts of the country. But people are not going to say it. People are not going to step out and say, 'I have a problem with Romney because he's Mormon.' What they're going to say is he's a flip-flopper... It's a fact; it's reality.
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The Bush administration doesn't particularly like public participation. It makes them look bad.
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If I go out with no make-up and a tracksuit on, nobody comes up to me. And if they do, I won't do a photo because I wouldn't want any photographic evidence.
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Peace between Israel and Palestine would be a giant step toward greater regional stability, and it would finally let both Israelis and Palestinians benefit from the Middle East's growing wealth.
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I'm not in favour of dividing Hindus and Sikhs. I'm not in favour of dividing Hindus and Christians. All the citizens, all the voters, are my countrymen.
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People wish to be settled; only as far as they are unsettled is there any hope for them.
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The world, somebody wrote, is the place we prove real by dying in it.
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Greed puts out the sun.
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There's a game out there, and the stakes are high. And the guy who runs it figures the averages all day long and all night long. Once in a while he lets you steal a pot. But if you stay in the game long enough, you've got to lose. And once you've lost there's no way back, no way at all.
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«The worse the better for all and the worse for all the better, the better for me, yours, political benefit.»
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Not forgiving is like drinking rat poison, and then waiting around for the rat to die.
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I used to be a Geico Caveman for live events. I was a corporate mascot. It was the silliest job. It was actually awesome and fun, but it was retarded.
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I don't think anyone can tell you what it is that makes you a star.
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It's just so much fun to relax and just play baseball for a living. It's a great time in my life. I'm never going to forget it, and it's very humbling.
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To be unkind to anyone. There's no room for that. Not on my watch.
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Lest we forget, when Europe goes far right, they go far right through Belgium.
