Johnny Vegas Quotes
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I've spent lots of time in London, I studied in London, I like London. It's just not my home.
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You know, there's that temptation in interviews to make yourself sound - well, to give yourself a bit of mystery.
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My work's never been accepted by my family, but it's something I'll always carry on with.
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I am a big fan of smelly cheeses but the rest of the family don't seem to be particularly keen on them.
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I came back from university thinking I knew all about politics and racism, not knowing my dad had been one of the youngest-serving Labour councillors in the town and had refused to work in South Africa years ago because of the situation there. And he's never mentioned it - you just find out. That's a real man to me. A sleeping lion.
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When I wasn't as attractive as I am now, I suffered at the hands of cruel children and their taunts until I realised that confidence and a bit of aesthetic care can overcome that.
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I came from a very loving home, had a happy life with no great aspirations, but going to the seminary changed me. There was a chunk of my childhood missing. Once I'd realised it wasn't for me, I still felt a tremendous pressure to continue for fear of letting everybody down.
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I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll see if any other interesting parts come up.
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It can be tough as a jobbing actor.
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I believe that Britain is becoming more class-conscious, and I quake at the very idea of Old Etonians ruling the world again.
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Class still matters in Britain today.
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Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out.
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They look outside the windows of their apartment in town and realize they're not living in a terrace anymore. This is a room full of dreamers who like to go to London for a day.
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I sang 'American Pie' a lot in my stage set. It had a knack of uniting an audience in a sing-along. It's a clever song about American history but wrapped in a fantastic tune.
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People are always asking, 'Where does Michael Pennington end and Johnny Vegas begin,' and you're going, 'It's not like that: it's blurred right across.'
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I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and terrible with them. As for doing a gig at a 6-year old's birthday party, you couldn't pay me enough.
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We had a week off in the middle of shooting, but as soon as everyone stopped, we all went down with six different types of flu and other unmentionable diseases.
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Oh, I'm terrible at travel.
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You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow 'cause they can be so foolish like that at times, they are easily led.
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I trained to be a priest - started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex, not even on my birthday, I changed my mind.
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I've got too much respect for stand-ups to call myself one.
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There was always that thing with 'Johnny' - I always saw myself as his writer and PR. But when he got out there, I had no control. His whole thing was going off on those flights of fancy. Going, 'Let's see what we can possibly do that hasn't been done before up here.' And when it works, it's lovely; it's a great night.
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I think it sort of dawns on you that if you're not gigging constantly you're not actually relevant. You may be relevant to a different part of the media now, to television commissioners and editors, but to a young live-comedy audience you're not, really.
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There's a domino effect with certain things you say.