Mike Birbiglia Quotes

What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.

Mike Birbiglia

• Funny
• Relationship
• Comedy

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Quotes to Explore

• They were saying computers deal with numbers. This was absolutely nonsense. Computers deal with arbitrary information of any kind.

  

  Ted Nelson
  • Saying
  • Computers
  • Nonsense

• Cinema affects everything, from the way I get dressed to how I build my stages.

  

  Paloma Faith
  • Everything
  • Build
  • Cinema

• I like a twisted sense of humour. On 'A History of Violence,' David Cronenberg and I would be doing the grimmest scenes and laugh a lot.

  

  Viggo Mortensen
  • History
  • Violence
  • Laugh

• My experience with music, I'm not going to say extremely negative, but it's definitely been a grind; it's been grimy - it hasn't been a pretty process. It's left me crying, you know, on the carpet in my tiny apartment with, like, no money. But it's been worth it, it's my passion, my dream, it's what I love to do.

  

  Kat Graham
  • Music
  • Money
  • Love

• It is right that he too should have his little chronicle, his memories, his reason, and be able to recognize the good in the bad, the bad in the worst, and so grow gently old down all the unchanging days, and die one day like any other day, only shorter.

  

  Samuel Beckett
  • Good
  • Bad
  • Die

• It hurts every day when you practice hard, but when this decathlon is over, I got the rest of my life to recuperate. Who cares how bad it hurts?

  

  Caitlyn Jenner
  • Life
  • Bad
  • Day

• The biggest compliments I've heard about 'That Metal Show' are the ones from people that say that they don't even listen to this kind of music, but, 'We love watching the show.'

  

  Eddie Trunk
  • People
  • Music
  • Love

• I think being busy is a healthy thing.

  

  Taron Egerton
  • Think
  • Healthy
  • Busy

• Politicians know that structural reforms - to increase competition, foster innovation, and drive institutional change - are the way to tackle structural impediments to growth. But they know that while the pain from reform is immediate, gains are typically delayed and their beneficiaries uncertain.

  

  Raghuram Rajan
  • Change
  • Pain
  • Growth

• I do think from time to time that conceptual questions arise: What do we mean by equilibrium? What do we mean by this concept and that concept?

  

  Edmund Phelps
  • Time
  • Think
  • Questions

• Honestly, I think we should be delighted people still want to read, be it on a Kindle or a Nook or whatever the latest device is.

  

  Joanne Rowling
  • People
  • Think
  • Want

• Media populism means appealing to people directly through media. A politician who can master the media can shape political affairs outside of parliament and even eliminate the mediation of parliament.

  

  Umberto Eco
  • People
  • Political
  • Media

• If you go back to any period in India's history, all the hard decisions this country had to take were taken when the Congress was in power.

  

  P. Chidambaram
  • Country
  • Power
  • History

• I view myself as a dealmaker.

  

  Gary Bettman
  • Myself
  • View

• Our dreaming capacity gives us a peep into the glorious realities that await us further on. It is the evidence of things possible to us.

  

  Orison Swett Marden
  • Possible
  • Evidence
  • Dreaming

• I am at one of the best clubs in the world and in the best league. And in my private life, everything is also going very well. At 25, I feel in the right place.

  

  Eden Hazard
  • Life
  • World
  • Best

• If organized religion has become less relevant, it's not because churches have held fast to their creedal beliefs - it's because they've held fast to their conventional structures, programs, roles and routines.

  

  Gary Hamel
  • Religion
  • Beliefs
  • Fast

• If you happen to live close to the desert border, you can pretty much calculate how long it will be before you have to carry your kids away and abandon your home and your life as you know it.

  

  Magnus Larsson
  • Life
  • Long
  • Live

• When I was eight, I bought my first puppet. It was a monkey, and I paid five cents for it. I collected some scrap wood and built myself a puppet theatre. I made 32 cents with my first show, which I thought was pretty good, and that's when I knew I would be a puppeteer when I grew up.

  

  Caroll Spinney
  • Up
  • Good
  • Pretty

• Do not move, do not go. Sink within this moment. Hold it for ever.

  

  Virginia Woolf
  • Moving
  • Moments

• The Olympics are never just about sports.

  

  George Packer
  • Sports

• I have a 10 year old at home, and she is always saying, 'That's not fair.' When she says that, I say, "Honey, you're cute; that's not fair. Your family is pretty well off; that's not fair. You were born in America; that's not fair. Honey, you had better pray to God that things don't start getting fair for you.

  

  P. J. O'Rourke
  • God
  • Family
  • Home

• I make big objects that are simple, bright and clear, kind of ironic but hopefully funny because I love the shapes, and I get inspiration from toys and books, and I believe in art for everyone.

  

  Florentijn Hofman
  • Art
  • Funny
  • Inspiration

• What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.

  

  Mike Birbiglia
  • Funny
  • Relationship
  • Comedy