Andy Borowitz Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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There was just a lot of comedy on the TV in the house, and my parents are both very funny.
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I was an expert horseman.
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Somebody gets to be smart and somebody gets to be dumb. If we win, it'll be because of the president. And if we lose, it'll be because of me.
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I got in a really bad accident in a Toyota vehicle, but I feel like the safety of the vehicle and God really saved my life.
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I need one psychological expert to help me concentrate.
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I put my thoughts in a book, which must mean I don't want anyone to read them.
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I think Teach for America has suffered from the fact that I did not teach, in a major way. I also think if I had taught, I wouldn't have started Teach for America.
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I think I owe it to myself to put my best effort forward and prove how good I can be.
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Music was always part of my life - my mother says I came out singing. I wanted to be Gene Kelly - or Judy Garland.
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The moral is that a career can be gone in an instant. And all you have in this world are the people you love.
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Our focused customers are small business and young people. We did a great job in China. How can we help those young people in India, in Pakistan, in Africa. If they can use in the same ways.
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An allegory is not meant to be taken literally. There is a great lack of comprehension on the part of some readers.
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I remember in 'Pride and Prejudice' I had to do a scene where I broke down. And before we filmed I spent like three hours imagining my mum's funeral. Actually, she's very much alive, happy and healthy. It was really horrible.
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I like to travel by myself.
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In international relations, in foreign policy, a great deal has to do with historical circumstances, a great deal has to do with the sense and perception of people.
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But the exposure we got by doing the stint with Nine Inch Nails brought us a lot of attention.
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I have been given the authority over you, and I am not the best of you. If I do well, help me; and if I do wrong, set me right. Sincere regard for truth.
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The core character of Victorians is one of aspiration and ambition, and Victorians have, since first settlement days... demonstrated that core character over and over again.
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Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off until the day after tomorrow what should have been done the day before yesterday.
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As his partner on this amazing journey, I can tell you Mitt Romney was not handed success. He built it.
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No advantages in this world are pure and unmixed.
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Social media changed Chinese mindset. More and more Chinese intend to embrace freedom of speech and human rights as their birthright, not some imported American privilege. But also, it gave the Chinese a national public sphere for people to, it's like a training of their citizenship, preparing for future democracy.
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One thing I know is that I don't want to be a director for hire, making genre films.
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Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don't really know.
