Andy Borowitz Quotes

You can return all the Christmas gifts you want, but you will never get back the time spent with your relatives.

Andy Borowitz

• Time
• Return
• Gifts

• Previous
• Next

Quotes to Explore

• I paint for the sheer joy of painting. I have never sold any of my paintings. I'd rather give them to people for free.

  

  Takeshi Kitano
  • People
  • Free
  • Joy

• Everybody sooner or later has to drop the luggage and the baggage of illusions.

  

  Carlos Santana Santana
  • Illusions
  • Drop
  • Luggage

• I think there was a time when I considered myself a work addict, but that's no longer accurate. My life has changed so dramatically over the last number of years, especially having a family now. My priorities have shifted.

  

  Edie Falco
  • Life
  • Time
  • Work

• Exposing your ignorance is how you get somebody to embrace you.

  

  Larry Wilcox
  • You
  • Ignorance
  • Embrace

• No person is just one particular emotion.

  

  Octavia Spencer
  • Person
  • Emotion
  • Just

• All human beings are also dream beings. Dreaming ties all mankind together.

  

  Jack Kerouac
  • Together
  • Dream
  • Dreams

• 'The Museum of Innocence' is not about politics; it's a love story, but I think it's political in the sense that it wants to capture how a man suppresses a woman.

  

  Orhan Pamuk
  • Man
  • Woman
  • Politics

• A society is defined as much by how it comes to terms with its past as by its attitude toward the future: its memories are no less revealing than its aims.

  

  Octavio Paz
  • Future
  • Society
  • Past

• Since I am first of all a character writer, that character's emotions are as vivid to me as my own. I always begin with an emotion after I have established a character in my mind. I feel what they feel. I guess that is why it comes across so strongly.

  

  S. E. Hinton
  • Mind
  • Character
  • Feel

• I date, don't get me wrong. I'm not up here filing my fingernails on a Friday night. I want to find someone to share my life with.

  

  Tamron Hall
  • Life
  • Night
  • Wrong

• I think as I have got older, I have got a bit more relaxed, although you might not think that if you heard me screaming at my kids.

  

  Victoria Beckham Spice Girls
  • Kids
  • Think
  • You

• There is something very utopian about what I do. But utopia is nothing more than a truth that the world is not yet ready to hear.

  

  Yann Arthus-Bertrand
  • World
  • Truth
  • Utopia

• Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.

  

  Fran Lebowitz
  • Love
  • Romantic
  • For Her

• Staying fit is all about trying to find enjoyment in something physical, because that's the only way you're gonna get results.

  

  Kaley Cuoco
  • Trying
  • Find
  • Results

• If one is but secure at the foundation, he will not be pained by departure from minor details or affairs that are contrary to expectation. But in the end, the details of a matter are important. The right and wrong of one's way of doing things are found in trivial matters.

  

  Yamamoto Tsunetomo
  • Important
  • Expectation

• First-time novelists have a tough row to hoe. Our publishers don’t have a lot of promotional budget to throw at unknown factors like us. Mostly, we rise and fall based on word-of-mouth.

  

  Cory Doctorow
  • Time
  • Fall
  • Unknown

• Do me wrong, do me right,Tell me lies but hold me tight,Save your goodbyes for the morning light,But don't let me be lonely tonight.

  

  James Taylor
  • Light
  • Morning
  • Lies

• Lately I've been listening to some classical music again, some jazz.

  

  Alan Vega
  • Music
  • Listening

• Every year lays more earth upon us, which weighs us down from aerial regions, till we go under the earth at last.

  

  E. T. A. Hoffmann
  • Death
  • Earth
  • Years

• People think I am funny all the time. But I am not. I am serious, too. Also, I enjoy serious, dramatic films.

  

  Kapil Sharma
  • People
  • Time
  • Funny

• The world, and whatever that be which we call the heavens, by the vault of which all things are enclosed, we must conceive to be a deity, to be eternal, without bounds, neither created nor subject at any time to destruction. To inquire what is beyond it is no concern of man; nor can the human mind form any conjecture concerning it.

  

  Pliny the Elder
  • Time
  • World
  • Mind

• I understand why people might be interested. But I just don't talk about my personal life. It's a decision I made a long time ago, before I ever even knew anyone would be interested in my personal life.

  

  Anderson Cooper
  • People
  • Life
  • Time

• You can return all the Christmas gifts you want, but you will never get back the time spent with your relatives.

  

  Andy Borowitz
  • Time
  • Return
  • Gifts