Brett Gelman Quotes
I've always been an actor, even when I was doing improv and my own version of stand up.
Quotes to Explore
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'Obvious' is the most dangerous word in mathematics.
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I'd like to be remembered as one who kept my priorities in the right order.
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Before I was 5, I did have a lot of time on my hands. I had no job and really no career, and I spent an awful lot of time listening to records. It was more the classical ones, really - Prokofiev, and I think there was some Mozart in there, and more impressionistic composers like Delius.
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I can hardly eat meat because it has to look like something what it was not when it was alive.
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I think I 'turn off' women. I've a kind of a weird personality. Women may think that I'm a mess.
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I would dodge, not lie, in the national interest.
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You don't just wake up one morning and decide to become a singer-songwriter.
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Having money has given me a certain freedom, but being in the public eye has taken away a lot.
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I've learned to be more accepting of myself. I'm 37, not 18, and I've got the lines to prove it. I try to remind myself that a girl can have it all, just not all at once.
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A painter once told me that I'm like the Khajuraho, which you see once but which remains with you forever. I thought that was exquisite.
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I think people like it when you have a bit of personality.
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Two young actresses I admire are Emma Stone and Emma Watson, because they are intelligent, talented actresses and have a great sense of humor. They have learned to balance what they love in life - acting, school and everything else.
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I don't sleep. I hate those little slices of death.
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I don't go to New York. I don't go to parties. I just do my business and study nature. My career is 28 years in an obscure art school, with limited staff and no perks. All I am is a teacher.
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When you're first learning how to do eyeliner, it's really hard to get both lids the same. A good tip for when you're putting it on, is to make sure your elbow is on a table. Make sure your arm's really stable. And make sure you have an eye makeup q-tip to get that really sharp line.
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I'm hopeful that Israelis can go to Ramallah whenever they want and see how the people are living.
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Good satire comes from anger. It comes from a sense of injustice, that there are wrongs in the world that need to be fixed. And what better place to get that well of venom and outrage boiling than a newsroom, because you're on the front lines.
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I am the hero of Africa.
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Anytime you interfere with a natural process, you're playing God. God determines what happens naturally. That means when a person's ill, he shouldn't go to a doctor because he's asking for interference with God's will. But of course, patients can't think that way.
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I'm sick of making bloody history.
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I've got the long hair and kind of androgynous look. It's love-hate; it's sexy, but not sexy. So it's either you get it or you don't.
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When I was growing up, I was told you could be anything you want to be, but I didn't really believe that because you couldn't be president. Like, I knew that; we never had a black president.
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I've always been an actor, even when I was doing improv and my own version of stand up.
