P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Democrats hate Democrats most of all.
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There is only one thing that gives me hope as a Republican, and that is the Democrats. It's going to be hard to do a worse job running American than the Republicans have, but if anybody can do it, it's the Democrats.
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I spend my days kneeling in the muck of language, feeling around for gooey verbs, nouns, and modifiers that I can squash together to make a blob of a sentence that bears some likeness to reason and sense.
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Regulation creates a moral hazard.
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Predicting innovation is something of a self-canceling exercise: the most probable innovations are probably the least innovative.
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Every vote should carry a serial number, so that responsibility for harmful or careless use of the vote can be traced. Concealed voting should be outlawed.
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Who, other than a crazy person, does anything besides hang up on a robo-call? Any call, any person, anywhere, under any circumstances.
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My life would have gone along perfectly well, politically speaking, if it hadn't been for girls.
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I don't mind America becoming a Third World country. The weather is better in the Third World than it is where I live in New Hampshire. And household help will be much cheaper.
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Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
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It's hard to be serious in life.
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Farm policy, although it's complex, can be explained. What it can't be is believed. No cheating spouse, no teen with a wrecked family car, no mayor of Washington, D.C., videotaped in flagrante delicto has ever come up with anything as farfetched as U.S. farm policy.
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The more aspects of life that can be moved from private reign to public realm, the better it is for politics.
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Now for good or ill, California is the place where trends tend to be set in Western civilization - if civilization indeed it is. California, for several generations now, has been the newest, biggest, most experimental place in the newest, biggest, most experimental part of liberal Western capitalism - which is itself a new experiment for mankind.
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My ignorance is widespread.
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I don't watch much television.
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The average IQ in America is - and this can be proven mathematically - average.
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Adam Smith's huge failure was the fact that he did not foresee the industrial revolution.
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If the politics of disease are to be understood, particularly in the dreadful countries where this understanding is most needed, then the politics of total collapse have to be understood first.
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Space has always been confusing to politics.
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Imagine having journalists in your own home and not even covering the furniture with plastic sheets first.
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Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.
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The beauty of democracy is that an average, random, unremarkable citizen can lead it.
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Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreign policy.