Alexandra Petri Quotes

Standup comedy was my weird hobby. I would drag my poor parents out to the only open mics that were in coffee shops instead of bars. I'd get up and go, 'Hi, I'm 17, and I have jokes about matriculation!' At the time I was like, 'Why is no one laughing?'

Alexandra Petri

• Up
• Time
• Why
• Parents
• Comedy
• Weird
• Coffee

• Previous
• Next

Quotes to Explore

• The long irons are the nemesis of the average golfer. I'm convinced that the underlying reason for this is that he keeps hearing how hard they are to handle. They're not that difficult, truly.

  

  Jack Nicklaus
  • Long
  • Reason
  • Difficult

• Globalization has changed us into a company that searches the world, not just to sell or to source, but to find intellectual capital - the world's best talents and greatest ideas.

  

  Jack Welch
  • World
  • Best
  • Globalization

• I think what human beings need is to be able to laugh at the absurd, hold on to ambiguity, and learn to love nuance, instead of making everything one or the other, and structurally, so much of the Internet and online publishing doesn't have room for any of that.

  

  Tavi Gevinson
  • Human
  • Laugh
  • Absurd

• I'm still number one and I just recently won a major tournament ahead of my toughest rivals so I think I had a few years ahead of me if I decided to stay.

  Garry Kasparov
  • Think
  • Won
  • Tournament

• I just didn't know where I fit in - I didn't seem to fit in my parent's generation. I didn't seem to fit in my own generation. Little by little, this took me into a spiritual search for understanding; a search for meaning and fulfillment.

  

  Radhanath Swami
  • Understanding
  • Spiritual
  • Parent

• There is absolutely no reason in the world of blockchain to build in net settlement. It's like saying you have got a new Ferrari and we are going to put a lawnmower engine in it.

  

  Patrick M. Byrne
  • World
  • New
  • Saying

• I like someone with a really good and dark sense of humour.

  

  Paloma Faith
  • Good
  • Like
  • Dark

• News has become entertainment. Once that happens, a whole series of horrific events start to happen, whether it's the lack of dissemination of something that can inform you or something that actually negatively impacts society.

  

  Dan Gilroy Breakfast Club
  • Society
  • Start
  • News

• The last Pan Am Games in 2011 was one of the best experiences in my career. It was the first time women's boxing was in the Pan Am Games and any major games, and I had the opportunity to box in the first women's boxing fight and then went on to win gold.

  Mandy Bujold
  • Time
  • Women
  • Career

• Who would set a limit to the mind of man? Who would dare assert that we know all there is to be known?

  

  Galileo Galilei
  • Mind
  • Man
  • Limit

• Chaotic people often have chaotic lives, and I think they create that. But if you try and have an inner peace and a positive attitude, I think you attract that.

  

  Imelda Staunton
  • People
  • Peace
  • Positive

• Libertarians know that a free country has nothing to fear from anyone coming in or going out - while a welfare state is scared to death of poor people coming in and rich people getting out.

  

  Harry Browne
  • People
  • Country
  • Death

• Dave thought he was bigger than Van Halen the band. So there was this catfight going on for 10 years.

  

  Gary Cherone Van Halen
  • Band
  • Thought
  • Years

• Writing about 2,000 words in three hours every morning, 'Casino Royale' dutifully produced itself. I wrote nothing and made no corrections until the book was finished. If I had looked back at what I had written the day before I might have despaired.

  

  Ian Fleming
  • Writing
  • Book
  • Words

• The Supreme Court of the United States... has validated the Nazi method of execution in... concentration camps, starving them to death.

  

  Jack Kevorkian
  • Death
  • Execution

• One way the Tea Party has benefited female candidates - and the conservative movement generally - is by consciously steering clear of social issues.

  

  Hanna Rosin
  • Party
  • Tea
  • Conservative

• I have always despised people who thought they were better than others, and I made a promise to myself that I'd never turn into that kind of person. My family also helps to keep me grounded. Whenever I get a 'diva moment,' as they like to call it, they let me know it and say, 'Stop acting like a diva!' They're pretty good at it, too.

  

  Jackie Evancho
  • People
  • Good
  • Family

• All my films have some kind of statement about something - but I have to coat it with entertainment to make it palatable. Otherwise it becomes a polemic, and people don't want to see it. If you're trying to get a message out to people, you've got to entertain them at the same time.

  

  Larry Cohen
  • People
  • Time
  • Trying

• If I had my druthers, I would be a brain in a jar, with a burlap skirt around the cart I'm on - I don't attend to my physical being much.

  

  Kate McKinnon
  • Brain
  • Being
  • Physical

• You could grow up in Germany in the postwar years without ever meeting a Jewish person. There were small communities in Frankfurt or Berlin, but in a provincial town in south Germany, Jewish people didn't exist.

  

  W. G. Sebald
  • People
  • Up
  • Small

• We need to treat the planet as a system, and up until now, we've operated more as if the world were made of separate parts - this part is environment, this part is economy. But everything is connected. You can't fix global warming with a Ph.D. in thermodynamics!

  

  Neri Oxman
  • Up
  • World
  • Environment

• I didn't know how to show my self love, and I didn't want anyone else to hurt me. So my tough girl attitude was like, 'I'm not having it.'

  

  Mary J. Blige
  • Girl
  • Hurt
  • Attitude

• There was a pony named Barbapoppa that I received at the age of five, and he was very mischievous and maybe even devilish. Barbapoppa was the most fabulous first animal I was to have and challenged me much.

  

  Chantal Sutherland
  • Age
  • Animal

• Standup comedy was my weird hobby. I would drag my poor parents out to the only open mics that were in coffee shops instead of bars. I'd get up and go, 'Hi, I'm 17, and I have jokes about matriculation!' At the time I was like, 'Why is no one laughing?'

  

  Alexandra Petri
  • Up
  • Time
  • Why