Andy Kindler Quotes
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Why did God have to make Mo'Nique a good actress? What was God thinking when he decided to give Mo'Nique acting chops. Now we have to endure Mo'Nique comedy specials.
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'The Graduate' should have won best picture over 'In the Heat of the Night.'
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Louie is hugely talented. But I get very annoyed at the way the media... say, 'Louis C.K. is the greatest stand-up in the world.' He's not the greatest stand-up in the world. He's not funnier than Dave Attell.
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I'm interested in Jeff Bridges. I love that guy. And I did like Carey Mulligan in 'An Education.' And I love Meryl Streep, but if they could ban 'Julie & Julia,' I'd be in favor of that.
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I have so many strong opinions on the entertainment industry, but if I'm in a deli somewhere, and someone says they love that Adam Sandler movie where he dresses up as his twin sister - well, I don't want to make people feel bad for how they feel about things. I'm always courteous, not mean.
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I'm not a confrontational person in real life, so I really don't wanna get into arguments or fistfights with people I'm making fun of.
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The right wing is appealing to a shrinking, shrinking demographic of angry white people who blame their predicament in life on the fact that there are immigrants coming into the country; it's pretty ludicrous.
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I'm tired of demographic appeal being more important than talent. I want to fight against that.
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I did not sell Amway, but I sold Shaklee, which was an Amway-type product sold through multi-level marketing.
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I've sold a lot of different product. Very briefly, I sold Time Life Books on the phone.
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I would like Albert Brooks to have received the Oscars for best actor, best director and best screenplay for 'Modern Romance.' I love that movie.
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I always had a tremendous amount of rage about the business, and I thought turning that into comedy was healthy.
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I've always felt that there's a Catskills comic who lives in my head and is constantly trying to get out. There's all these jokes that have been passed down from Jewish generation to Jewish generation, which I love but which I've always made fun of.
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I came out to L.A. in '78 to be a musician. I didn't get into comedy until the mid-Eighties.
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I have to say, after hanging out with Republicans for four days, I want to take a look at my own birth certificate. I don't think I was born in this country.
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I've given myself permission to say whatever's on my mind when I'm on stage.
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There are so many people who just want a flashy object in front of their eyes and don't want to think at all; I find that disturbing.
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If I love a comic but they have an off night, who am I to say they should have taken out this or added that? It doesn't work that way... I have no interest in hurting people's feelings.
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I am the smartest comedian in the history of the world.
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My favorite comedians are basically themselves onstage.
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I'm still doing what I've always wanted to do, and how big it gets or how much money I make for it or how popular I am in the public's eye is really not that important, even though it's hard to let that go.
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I don't hate Dane Cook, but I am trying to go after people I think are capable of more.
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I don't enjoy writing newspaper articles any more than people like reading them. I'm a standup comic, not a journalist, although sometimes onstage I will say: 'What else is in the news?' Writing is work, which I'm not comfortable with.
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George Lopez is always on the verge of hilarity. If he could ever think of something funny to say, if he had a funny thought in his mind, he's ready to go.