Andy Rooney Quotes
Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, "How can he want me the way I look in the morning?" It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.

Quotes to Explore
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Comedy's really subjective, you know; that's why it's so hard.
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Sometimes you read pilots and, understandably, they're doing such a frantic tap dance for approval. I get why - it's such an incredibly competitive market.
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There are really two kinds of optimism. There's the complacent, Pollyanna optimism that says, 'Don't worry - everything will be just fine,' and that allows one to just lay back and do nothing about the problems around you. Then there's what we call dynamic optimism. That's an optimism based on action.
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The other actresses, who are called my contemporaries, they started with a megastar. They were superstars overnight and are the same even today.
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I'm still number one and I just recently won a major tournament ahead of my toughest rivals so I think I had a few years ahead of me if I decided to stay.
Garry Kasparov -
The best example of how impossible it will be for Major League Baseball to crack down on steroids is the fact that baseball and the media are still talking about the problem as 'steroids.'
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On June 23, 1864, Ambrose Bierce was in command of a skirmish line of Union soldiers at Kennesaw Mountain in northern Georgia. He'd been a soldier for three years and, in that time, had been commended by his superiors for his efficiency and bravery during battle.
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I was afraid I would see someone from my past who thought I was this big athlete, and then I end up being just normal.
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It's like the brooding hen sitting over a china egg.
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One and one is two, and two and two is four, and five will get you ten if you know how to work it.
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I like to play a strong woman, but a strong woman can also be very fragile and vulnerable at the same time.
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I've spent my life visiting a handful of people who are very close to me when they've been committed to one hospital or another in New York.
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Bears are very nice, as long as you are nice to them.
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It's insane to me to ask anybody to be what they're not. Know what you know the best, love the most. That's always going to be the answer to the thing that you have the best shot at winning at.
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I'm on the front line and I am a rapper.
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Richard Nixon was the best thing that ever happened to journalism. I mean this guy was wonderful. Just when you thought he could get no worse, he got worse.
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Conflict is the beginning of consciousness.
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I don't prepare myself for a specific fighter. I don't choose a fight to prepare myself for another fighter.
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I'm so loud, as if I know what I'm on about, but deep inside, I'm so insecure. Just a little girl.
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I'd love to go back to Broadway; I'd love to do animation; I'd love to do hair and make-up campaigns because I love hair and makeup - and, I'd love to do film. I mean, there are a lot of doors I'd love to open up!
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Do not mistake a crowd of big wage-earners for the leisure class.
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In this world, you do your job, a good job, and that's what counts.
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Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, "How can he want me the way I look in the morning?" It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.