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The reason I did the book about holidays is that you're a different person on holiday. You're sleeping somewhere unfamiliar, knocking about with people you've never met and for 10 days you're someone else. You're out of your comfortable zone.
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Comedy's really subjective, you know; that's why it's so hard.
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I'd say the best is when I was in Africa, I saw a hippo in a house. Someone had a pet hippo. And they're meant to be one of the most dangerous animals on the planet, and they had one that was sort of just wandering in and out of their house, just sort of roaming about.
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It would be spiteful to put a Jellyfish in a trifle.
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Making the 'An Idiot Abroad' series, I was really dreading going to India; I thought I'd hate it. It was a nightmare, and I was really ill - just like everyone says.
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People who live in glass houses... have to answer the door.
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To me, a cat is an easy pet, they don't need any spoiling or looking after.
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I've learnt that, even though I've travelled about, I haven't changed that much.
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That's the problem with having a bald head. It exaggerates the shape.
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I had a bad experience doing public speaking at school. I had to talk about a pen for five minutes and it was really hard work. I couldn't wait to get off the stage.
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With evolution, things are always changing, so I sort of think: Should we all be growing three heads?
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To be honest, marriage doesn't scare me and that, it's just once you've been together for so long, if you haven't got any kids it's just a big expensive day out for everyone else to enjoy, isn't it?
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I don't know what the future is, but you just do it whilst it's there, don't you?
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If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this – two books, some television and everything – I'd panic, I'd be scared.
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When you've been on a programme called 'An Idiot Abroad' job offers aren't exactly flying in.
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People say if bees die out, the world would end, apparently. Now, I don't know if that's true, if that's some bee enthusiast who managed to write a good document, and people believe this.
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People who live in a glass house have to answer the door.
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I found that being with happy positive people annoys me.
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I don't really go out at night in terms of noisy, busy places; I prefer more of a quiet corner somewhere.
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I'm not a proper traveler. I don't like to be challenged or have too much of a change and prefer a week away just to relax.
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Chinese people age overnight.
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The poorer people and criminals of Mexico who are not very religious but not quite atheists, either, worship Saint Death.
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I am into nature and seeing whales. I went whale-watching, and I was really looking forward to that, but when you see it on TV and you see other programs do it, you're seeing close-ups of these massive creatures, and the music that's added gives you a certain feeling.
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I don't know what 'famous' is, really.