Karl Pilkington Quotes
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People who live in glass houses... have to answer the door.
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The reason I did the book about holidays is that you're a different person on holiday. You're sleeping somewhere unfamiliar, knocking about with people you've never met and for 10 days you're someone else. You're out of your comfortable zone.
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I've learnt that, even though I've travelled about, I haven't changed that much.
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It would be spiteful to put a Jellyfish in a trifle.
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Comedy's really subjective, you know; that's why it's so hard.
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I'd say the best is when I was in Africa, I saw a hippo in a house. Someone had a pet hippo. And they're meant to be one of the most dangerous animals on the planet, and they had one that was sort of just wandering in and out of their house, just sort of roaming about.
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That's the problem with having a bald head. It exaggerates the shape.
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With evolution, things are always changing, so I sort of think: Should we all be growing three heads?
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A slug is always on its own. It's a lonely insect.
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To me, a cat is an easy pet, they don't need any spoiling or looking after.
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I've never won many awards, I didn't get certificates for swimming or anything.
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We'll all die out eventually. Humans will be gone. And all I'm saying is, when people worry about polar bears disappearing or whatever, it's like, 'Well that's life, things will come and go, we'll find new species.'
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People who live in a glass house have to answer the door.
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I had a bad experience doing public speaking at school. I had to talk about a pen for five minutes and it was really hard work. I couldn't wait to get off the stage.
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Chinese people age overnight.
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I don't know what 'famous' is, really.
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I don't really go out at night in terms of noisy, busy places; I prefer more of a quiet corner somewhere.
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When you've been on a programme called 'An Idiot Abroad' job offers aren't exactly flying in.
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Parrots have gone a bit quiet since pirates have gone.
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People say if bees die out, the world would end, apparently. Now, I don't know if that's true, if that's some bee enthusiast who managed to write a good document, and people believe this.
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If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this – two books, some television and everything – I'd panic, I'd be scared.
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I don't know what the future is, but you just do it whilst it's there, don't you?
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I am into nature and seeing whales. I went whale-watching, and I was really looking forward to that, but when you see it on TV and you see other programs do it, you're seeing close-ups of these massive creatures, and the music that's added gives you a certain feeling.
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The poorer people and criminals of Mexico who are not very religious but not quite atheists, either, worship Saint Death.