Funny Quotes
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Being in a male-dominated industry, you can feel like a little excluded. That was making me feel like maybe I'm not funny. I was really seriously considering, like, quitting standup.
Phoebe Robinson
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Is it spoken word? Kinda, but that's a weird area. Is it comedy? Well, it's funny but no, it's not comedy.
Bruce McCulloch
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Does it hurt?” He bent his head and lightly kissed her forehead. “Only when I laugh.” “I’ll try not to be funny.” “Epic fail, beautiful.
Rachel Caine
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Never fight an inanimate object.
P. J. O'Rourke
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You're only as good as your last haircut.
Fran Lebowitz
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Usually, impersonations come out of something you dig, because you're listening to it over and over. And you kind of start developing... You're really trying to emulate them, then you realize, 'I sound ridiculous doing this. Oh, hey, maybe this is a funny impersonation.'
Alex Borstein
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It's funny because the action figures are cool, and then I enjoy the magazines because that's me. Obviously, the fans are wonderful - they're so excited - but I'm not Rey, and people tend to not be able to differentiate the two.
Daisy Ridley
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What I like best is a book that's at least funny once in a while. What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though.
J. D. Salinger
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I remember my fourth grade teacher reading 'Charlotte's Web' and 'Stuart Little' to us - both, of course, by E. B. White. His stories were genuinely funny, thought provoking and full of irony and charm. He didn't condescend to his readers, which was why I liked his books, and why I wasn't a big reader of other children's' books.
Louis Sachar
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It usually takes two people a little while to learn where the funny buttons are and testy buttons are.
Matt Lauer
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From the first time I saw Sid Caesar be funny I knew that's what I had to do.
Billy Crystal
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People ask what I am really trying to do with humor. The answer is, 'I'm getting even.' … For me, being funny is the best revenge.
Art Buchwald
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Thomas is racing for it, but McCovey is there and can't get his glove to it. That play shows the inexperience, not on Thomas' part, but on the part of Willie McC ... well, not on McCovey's part either.
Jerry Coleman
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I tell girls all the time that the men that have fallen in love with me, have all fallen during a man repeller stage... funny how life works out like that.
Rachel Roy
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Finley is going over to get a new piece of bat.
Jerry Coleman
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The ex-left-hander Dave Roberts will be going for Houston.
Jerry Coleman
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If boys say something that's not funny, you don't have to laugh.
Amy Poehler
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I'm just gonna tell her, 'Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they'll have to hire you, they can't really fire you, and you don't have to produce that much. It'll be awesome.'
Adam Carolla
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As I get older, all sorts of things become less funny. Once one has children, any cruelty involving children becomes far less amusing than when one was at the mercy of one's friends' and relatives' children.
P. J. O'Rourke
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When you knock people out, it's sometimes a very scary situation - but I always hoped that no one got seriously hurt. Now when I see them get knocked out, I laugh. When you finish the game, it's funny. And when I look at film of myself, I think, 'I wouldn't fight that guy.'
Marvin Hagler
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Sometimes I can't believe I'm going to be 60. I always say there's no point moaning about getting older, when there's nothing you can do about it. But still, I do find it quite funny. I look at that number, 60, and I think, really? Me?
Lesley Lawson
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Life is funny, and a lot of times, the people that I've met have really gone past anything that I've ever dreamed of, so I'm really grateful. My friendships really go from the West to the East. You'd be amazed at some of the people I call friends.
BeBe Winans