Funny Quotes
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If you don't know Tom Lehrer, you should - in addition to being a classical pianist, mathematician, songwriter, satirist, researcher at Los Alamos and, he claims, inventor of the Jell-O shot, he is just delightfully funny and graceful.
Rachel Sklar
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It is funny to me that because I can run, because I'm athletic, people tend to see that as my only asset.
Colin Kaepernick
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My dad would come to pick me up from high school in a beaver-skin cap, big gloves, his parka and everything. It was so funny to see him show up - his beard all frozen from being out with the dogs.
John Gourley
Portugal. The Man
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It is funny that people always assume you have a bigger part in a movie than you actually do. I remember a lot of people thought 'Adventureland' starred me and Kristen Wiig. But we were like, 'No, we're only in the movie for like ten minutes!'
Bill Hader
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It's pretty funny to me when I hear people say, 'I write six songs every day,' or, 'I turn out a song a day.' I bet you that's a whole week of bad songs.
Benji Hughes
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There was a time where I knew I was as funny as many dudes, but I had people telling me, 'You have to wear a dress onstage. You need to be more feminine.'
Leslie Jones
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As a rule, I don't like to laugh at the misfortune of others. The exception to that rule is if it's really, really funny.
Scott Adams
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You know the funny thing, I don't get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than I get along with the rich people.
Donald Trump
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Be Funny. Be naturally funny. If you're not, get out of the business. Be compassionate.
Chevy Chase
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I am built funny. Picture Mark Twain's head on Ichabod Crane's body. Now hold your mental picture to the light and crumple it.
Donald McCaig
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I still don't understand why when you put a piece of paper in a tray with solution in it, it comes up. It's still, in a sense, magic to me. It's a funny thing, you know. I've got two kids, and when they were very young, they used to come in the darkroom and I thought they'd be astounded by that. Nothing. When they got a little older, then they got astounded by it.
Garry Winogrand
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I'm a sucker for Thought Catalog. Shelby Fero is really funny on Twitter. And Patton Oswalt, he's sort of like a Twitter throb.
Addison Timlin
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Actually being funny is mostly telling the truth about things.
Bernard Sahlins
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If it is a joint return, we are instructed to print the given names of both husband and wife. But since some of the names that husband and wife give each other are hardly suited to print, we must proceed cautiously.
W. C. Fields
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It's funny that people think because you don't have a movie or record out, you disappear into a frozen chamber someplace. They think you're dead when you're not in the public eye.
Jason Schwartzman
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At first I was supposed to be the funny central figure, ... But with that format the show might have lasted about four weeks. The way it worked out is, the other people say the funny lines and my character looks on as an observer.
Andy Griffith
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If you have a movie that doesn't strive to go to a certain emotional point, you can do anything and it will be fine and funny. But if you have something pretty emotional at its core, you have to make it right. You don't want it overwrought or unearned. Everything has to be moving towards this one thing.
Jennifer Yuh Nelson
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If you think of the people who are funny in your life, you'll note it's not because they tell jokes, it's because of their character. If you develop characters, then you'll know them, and you'll know how they'll speak. The comedy will come out of the character.
Anne Beatts
