Charlie Brooker Quotes
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In the age of social media, everyone's a newspaper columnist, exaggerating what they think and feel.
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Games get a bad press compared with, say, opera - even though they're obviously better, because no opera has ever compelled an audience member to collect a giant mushroom and jump across some clouds.
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If the Walkman had, by default, silently contacted your friends and told them what you were listening to, not only would no one have bought a Walkman in the first place, its designers would have been viewed with the utmost suspicion.
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On 'Black Mirror,' we don't tend to deal with big, powerful people, because when you look at a Weinstein or something, you think, 'Is he capable of feeling anything?'
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I'm no financial expert. I scarcely know what a coin is. Ask me to explain what a credit default swap is, and I'll emit an unbroken 10-minute 'um' through the clueless face of a broken puppet. You might as well ask a pantomime horse.
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I hate Macs. I have always hated Macs. I hate people who use Macs. I even hate people who don't use Macs but sometimes wish they did. Macs are glorified Fisher-Price activity centres for adults; computers for scaredy cats too nervous to learn how proper computers work; computers for people who earnestly believe in feng shui.
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...The result is the most nauseating display of artificial camaraderie since the horrific Doritos 'Friendchips' TV campaign (which caused 50,000 people to kill themselves in 2003, or should have done).
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In many ways, Big Brother is the present day equivalent of a 1980s Club 18-30 Holiday - flirting, sunbathing, silly little organised games, and lots of people you'd like to remove from the genepool with a cricket bat.
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There are different groups of people in your life that you behave slightly differently with. You behave one way with your family. You behave in a different way with your work colleagues. You behave differently with your friends from the movie club, your fitness instructor - all subtly different personas.
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A cupcake is just a muffin with clown puke topping.
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Short of finding a place on the witness protection programme, you don't get many opportunities to completely reinvent your life. Going to university changes that. Away from home, away from parents, away from anyone who remembers you from school, you can pretend to be far cooler and more experienced than you are.
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Well, babies are notoriously foul-mouthed. shot of Charlie pointing at a doll This one just called Derek a prick!
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God, people say 'Black Mirror' was horrible - it's nothing compared to the stuff that happens in 'Grimms' Fairy Tales.' It's mind-bending.
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People bemoan the loss of watercooler chat, but I think that there's more of that than ever. It's just that it's online.
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I liked that sort of thing, those one-off stories like 'Tales of the Unexpected,' 'Hammer House of Horror,' 'The Twilight Zone' and 'Alfred Hitchcock Presents.'
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I used to draw comics a lot. I was obsessed with 'The Young Ones,' and was massively into video games, although I was no good at them.
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'The Twilight Zone' was sometimes shockingly cruel, far crueller than most TV drama today would dare to be.
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When a monk takes a vow of silence, is he still allowed to post messages on the Internet? Chances are God won't find out. Being ancient, God probably can't work computers. He holds the mouse gingerly, like it's made of fine china.
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I'm extremely neurotic; it's the way my brain is built.
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What I disliked most about working as a shop assistant wasn't the occasional snooty customer or the shop or the hours, but the way people reacted when I told them I was a shop assistant - their automatic assumption that I didn't enjoy it.
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Hello, I'm Charlie Brooker and you're watching Screenwipe, a programme all about television.
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If someone doesn't respond to a phone call, I think they've died.
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Until this week the one thing I knew about the Twilight saga was that it had vampires in it, which was enough to put me off. I didn't realise it was a romantic fantasy aimed at teenage girls. Turns out it's possible to be put off something twice before you've actually seen it.
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With 'Hang the DJ,' I was concerned that it was more comedic and much lighter than we normally do for 'Black Mirror.'