Chelsea Handler Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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Let's judge a man on what he's done.
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I've spent so many years talking about poverty and economic justice, I'm strongly tempted to get biblical. Jesus' teachings are so radical; they're just insanely generous and apocalyptic. Christians become more fascinated by the dead Jesus. They don't like the living Jesus.
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I've got Asperger's syndrome and I'm not a very good people person, so I've always been more comfortable around machinery. Not in a weird way - I don't want to marry my car or anything stupid like that!
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I was a big 'Battlestar Galactica' fan and 'Star Trek' fan. I grew up watching those.
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Alan Rickman's Hans Gruber is the greatest bad guy in a movie ever.
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It is much more difficult to measure nonperformance than performance.
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Losing a child is probably the singular most horrible thing.
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I work eight hours a day, but I'm not writing all that time. I'm thinking, editing, looking something up. Thinking is what I do a lot of.
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I still keep my accent.
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I'm a chubby middle-aged white guy with short hair. I think that's it, really. I kind of have a look. Right now, I'm not fat enough to be the fat friend, but I'm not thin enough to be the leading man, so I look like a cop.
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Every time I work on a new set, I take whatever I can from it and learn as much as I can around the people who I am working with.
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I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself.
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Your plays are always personal. You can't help seeing yourself in the serial killer you've just written. But they get less specifically personal.
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I've made up my mind. I'll take my court martial.
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If you don't shop smart, you get a little trendy.
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My whole life I've had the fear that I was going to be abandoned.
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No industry in living memory has collapsed faster than daily print journalism.
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I don't care how popular I am. I'm not putting myself out there to run for higher office.
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From my earliest days I had a passion for science.
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There is, hidden or flaunted, a sword between the sexes till an entire marriage reconciles them.
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What I believe is that marriage is between a man and a woman, but what I also believe is that we have an obligation to make sure that gays and lesbians have the rights of citizenship that afford them visitations to hospitals, that allow them to be, to transfer property between partners, to make certain that they're not discriminated on the job.
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Marriage requires searing honesty at all costs. I learned that from my third wife.
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What is right for one couple is wrong for another. I would say that there are many more important factors to a happy marriage.
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I do think about marriage, but it's not the end-all goal.
