Chelsea Handler Quotes
Stand-up was my entree into the entertainment world. I didn't have to act out somebody else's words. I could just stand there with a microphone, and nobody would interrupt me. It's the most narcissistic thing you could probably do.
Quotes to Explore
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I don't like to say anything good. I feel like I'll jinx myself.
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I keep dumbbells in my trailer, and I work out between takes.
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I never got into politics for it to be a career.
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I'm a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I'm into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.
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Until now, I was insecure and I believed what the people around me said in regarding what I should sing.
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When people refer to 'Back in the Day,' it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.
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My dad is afraid of my laugh.
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I started making music with my band in the '80s, so I am more product of post punk than classical music, and I have always carried on this way.
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The only way a kid is going to practice is if it's total fun for him... and it was for me.
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Ecuador has about 700 kilometers of border with Colombia, and a lot of it is impenetrable jungle.
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You promised to take care of me and not to turn your back on me. How is it possible that you never wrote to me even once and you never came back to see me? Do you think that it is fun for me to spend months, even years, without any news, without any hope!
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People who drive Jeeps are people who like to do outdoor activities.
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Winning, you can overlook so many things.
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As anyone who has covered the company for any length of time knows, Yahoo's record on major decision-making has been akin to a hippie commune - a lot of wrangling internally in a culture where everyone seems to have a voice and a reticence to push the button to launch.
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I used to love to create outfits, and I still do - I just don't have the time. How can you wear one thing and never wear it again? Even my wedding dress - I had a dress made that I could wear again. I'm a child of the depression, so I'm very, very practical.
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The red-carpet thing of premieres and parties is probably my least favourite part of my job.
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My husband and I were married in May 2007 on a sprawling rent-a-ranch in the Texas Hill Country. On the drive from Houston, we'd stopped off for our marriage license in the former produce aisle of a Winn Dixie-turned-courthouse in San Marcos and from there drove off the grid.
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I wanted to look at the mentality that can breed that sort of intensity, that kind of cutthroat, pressure-cooker feeling, especially a form of music like jazz, that should be - or you'd think should be - all about liberation and improvisation and everything.
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I walked into a gunfight with a knife to kill you, and cut you so fast when your blood spilled it was still blue.
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Although most executives pay lip service to the idea of hiring for cultural fit, few have the courage or discipline to make it the primary criteria for bringing someone into the company.
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But really it was just, it was perfect. You know, I actually got that feeling like you know what, maybe this is why I'm alive, you know - maybe this is why I'm here on this on earth.
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When I found out that Santa Claus wasn't real, I wasn't upset; rather, I was relieved that there was a much simpler phenomenon to explain how so many children all over the world got presents on the same night! The story had been getting pretty complicated -- it was getting out of hand.
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I want to try to become the best golfer in the world.
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Stand-up was my entree into the entertainment world. I didn't have to act out somebody else's words. I could just stand there with a microphone, and nobody would interrupt me. It's the most narcissistic thing you could probably do.
