Bill Engvall Quotes
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A Decade of Laughs (2004)
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Tow truck is pulling Bill's car out of his driveway
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After Bill is exhausted at a baseball fantasy camp, walking crooked.
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In the store, Bill is buying some pants.
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The one thing people like about my show is it's universal. Everybody can relate to it. I think people enjoy going to a show and saying, 'Something like that happened to me.'
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I love stand up, but every year, the road takes a little more out of you.
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I'm from Texas. You would think my biggest draw would be in that state. But my biggest draw is Pennsylvania.
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taking a vacation with his family in Costa Rica
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about how he and his wife can't go out on a date, since they're married
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(mimicking a big fish talking to a little fish)
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Engvall is in an office elevator going up.
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I'm a blue collar guy.
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I don't have big time celebrity friends - I'm just a guy.
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People all over are finding themselves in jobs they never thought they'd be in.
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I love playing the bitter guy.
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I was doing a bit that stupid people should be slapped. But the more I did it, the more I didn't like that connotation, the violence and all that. The more I thought about it, I thought they should just wear signs. And, man, it just took off.
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My belief is that if we take away that right to bear arms, the only people that are going to have them are... the ones breaking into your house.
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Left to my own vices, all I would own is a Corvette, and it would be broken down.
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Here's Your Sign: Live! (2004)
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Engvall and his buddy get off a boat with a big string of bass.