Jasper Fforde Quotes
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It took me ten years and seven books to bag an agent - it took me that long to start writing good.
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How fishy on the fishiness scale? Ten is a stickleback and one is a whale shark." "A whale isn't a fish, Thursday." "A whale shark is--sort of." "All right, it's as fishy as a crayfish." "A crayfish isn't a fish." "A starfish, then." "Still not a fish." "This is a very odd conversation, Thursday.
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Individual words, sounds, squiggles on paper with no meanings other than those with which our imagination can clothe them.
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You speak baby gibberish?' asked Jack. 'Fluently. The adult-education center ran a course, and I have a lot of time on my hands.' 'So what did he say?' 'I don't know.' 'I thought you said you spoke gibberish?' 'I do. But your baby doesn't. I think he's speaking either pre-toddler nonsense, a form of infact burble or an obscure dialect of gobbledygook. In any event, I can't understand a word he's saying.' 'Oh.
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Cash is always the deciding factor in such matters of moral politics; nothing ever gets done unless motivated by commerce or greed.
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After all, reading is arguably a far more creative and imaginative process than writing; when the reader creates emotion in their head, or the colors of the sky during the setting sun, or the smell of a warm summer's breeze on their face, they should reserve as much praise for themselves as they do for the writer - perhaps more.
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For a taste that's a bit more distinct, eat a bird before it's extinct.
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Take no heed of her.... She reads a lot of books.
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Mr. Pewter led them through to a library, filled with thousands of antiquarian books. 'Impressive, eh?' 'Very,' said Jack. 'How did you amass all these?' 'Well,' said Pewter, 'You know the person who always borrows books and never gives them back?' 'Yes...?' 'I'm that person.
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Maybe those sorts of yes-or-no life-and-death decisions are easier to make because they are so black and white. I can cope with them because it's easier. Human emotions, well. . .they're just a fathomless collection of grays and I don't do so well on the midtones.
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Love is a wonderful thing, my dear, but it leaves you wide open for blackmail.
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I loved him, officer. More than any woman ever loved an egg.
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There's something rotten in the state of Denmark, and Hamlet says...it's payback time!
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Fiction wouldn't be much fun without its fair share of scoundrels, and they have to live somewhere.
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A good butler should save his employer's life at least once a day.
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A surfeit of information often hides an untruth,” he said, with annoying clarity.
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Were you listening to a word I said ' 'I kind of switched off when you drew breath.
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There is a contract between the reader and the writer. The readers give me their hard-earned cash, and I have to entertain them.
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The fun one can have writing books about books is limitless, to be honest.
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Apart from the faint odor of ink that pervaded the scene, it might have been real.
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Sometimes, a word succeeds beyond the wildest dreams of its creators, like a virus sent into the world to infect common speech.
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I've got six months to sort out the hackers, get the Japanese knotweed under control and find an acceptable form of narcissus.
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The universe always moves from an ordered state to a disordered one; that a glass may fall to the ground and shatter yet you never see a broken glass reassemble itself and then jump back on the table.
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We were developing a machine that used egg white, heat and sugar to synthesize methanol when a power surge caused an implosion. Owens was meringued. By the time we chipped him out the poor chap had expired.