Jasper Fforde Quotes
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Comedy was one of those genres that while appearing quite jolly was actually highly dangerous.
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A good butler should save his employer's life at least once a day.
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Growth purely for its own sake is the philosophy of cancer.
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Reality TV was to me the worst form of entertainment--the modern equivalent of paying sixpence to watch lunatics howling at the wall down at the local madhouse.
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For a taste that's a bit more distinct, eat a bird before it's extinct.
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Yes, and imagine a world where there were no hypothetical situations.
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I still feel threatened by academics, but my books have a lot of academic in-jokes and everybody assumes I went to university and studied English.
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Journeys up the Metaphoric River are hugely enjoyable and highly recommended. Since every genre is nourished by its heady waters, a paddle steamer can take even the most walk-shy tourists to their chosen destination. As a bonus, there is traditionally at least one murder on board each trip--a "consideration" to the head steward will ensure that it is not you.
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That's the thing about destiny: It can't be predicted, and it's usually pretty odd.
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If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher.
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We all make mistakes at some time in our lives, some more than others. It is only when the cost is counted in human lives that people really take notice.
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Humpty had always sat on walls, it was his way.
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I've never been averse to a little risk - after all, writing without risk is not really writing at all. Sometimes one has to just let fly with a high concept piece and see where the pieces fall. As it generally turns out, the central story is familiar, but just with different rules of engagement.
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People don't change just because you know more about them.
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Mr. Pewter led them through to a library, filled with thousands of antiquarian books. 'Impressive, eh?' 'Very,' said Jack. 'How did you amass all these?' 'Well,' said Pewter, 'You know the person who always borrows books and never gives them back?' 'Yes...?' 'I'm that person.
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I was on HPD--Heathcliff Protection Duty--in Wuthering Heights for two years, and believe me, the ProCaths tried everything. I personally saved him from assassination eight times.
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Books" - Snell smiled - "are a kind of magic.
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The universe always moves from an ordered state to a disordered one; that a glass may fall to the ground and shatter yet you never see a broken glass reassemble itself and then jump back on the table.
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Librarying is a harder profession than the public realizes, he said. People think it's all rubber stamps, knowing that Dewey 521 is celestial mechanics and saying 'Try looking under fiction' sixty eight times a day.
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Whereas story is processed in the mind in a straightforward manner, poetry bypasses rational thought and goes straight to the limbic system and lights it up like a brushfire. It's the crack cocaine of the literary world.
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Governments and fashions come and go but Jane Eyre is for all time.
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I would so hate to be a first-person character! Always on your guard, always having people read your thoughts!
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Pretend to be mad and talk a lot. Then — and this is the important bit — do nothing at all until you absolutely have to and then make sure everyone dies.
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Words are like leaves,. . .like people really, fond of their own society.