Jo Brand Quotes
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People are so different in reality from the picture created of them on TV. So it's all a creation; everything is made up.
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My preference is swimming in the sea. I find the sea is more liberating, wild and good fun rather than plodding up and down a pool.
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I believe that if your brain has to get to grips with complicated words, then you won't get Alzheimer's. I'm sure it's not true, but I do believe it.
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I used to get a lot of people saying 'Oh, you are such a lucky granny.' But the fact of the matter is you can be a grandma at 35 these days.
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The thing I thought about doing it was it's Comic Relief and you've got to be funny. So although I did try to sing properly it obviously has hilarious results when you can't sing.
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People can forgive each other.
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I don't know if we will ever try again because those sort of things are very hard to organise but yes, I've known Doon for years and John as well but I hadn't met Will before, and he turned out to be a good laugh.
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I have two brothers and we basically spent our lives playing in the woods, falling in ponds, getting chased by wasps and riding donkeys that we shouldn't have been riding.
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I've no interest in fashion, shoes, handbags, or sweaty shopping.
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Having children is fab. They keep me young and make me get up in the morning.
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Being Christian towards poor people means trying to improve their lives and give them back some self-respect.
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I must be an anorexic because an anorexic looks in the mirror and sees a fat person.
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One thing lots of Christians do have in common is that they can't help coming across as smug. This winds lots of people up, particularly because famous Christians pronounce on the life of the poor from their very lovely affluent homes filled with their very lovely families and attractive pets.
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By crying on my bed, drinking quite a lot and feeling tempted by drugs. Well, just not reading it to be perfectly honest with you. I know it's a bit of a copout.
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What could be funnier than a fat person trying to run a marathon?
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I wasn't one of those hideous children who make their parents sit through hour-long performances when you're seven. I didn't do anything like that thankfully.
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I'm sure some cynical people would point to that as the main reason for doing it for a lot of people.
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I had always fancied a go at the comedy and when it started to go reasonably well and the opportunity arose for me to move into it full time, I just couldn't turn it down. I just took the risk, and I just wanted to see if it would work and thankfully it did.
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Madness isn't altogether a bad thing in comedy.
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Men are fantastic - as a concept.
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I swam at school a lot. Long-distance swimming in pools, and diving, then when we moved to Hastings when I was 13 I used to swim in the sea all the time; I loved it out of season and when it was rough.
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Once you get labelled, people expect you to behave within the very narrow confines of that label.
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I used to do bell ringing in Benenden church. It was really good fun, actually. My best friend's dad was the local vicar, and so it was expected as her best friend that I would go to church every Sunday with her.
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I thought I was funny as a kid.