Steve Martin Quotes
- All Quotes
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I guess I wouldn't believe in anything if it weren't for my lucky astrology mood watch.
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My most persistent memory of stand - up is of my mouth being in the present and my mind being in the future: the mouth speaking the line, the body delivering the gesture, while the mind looks back, observing, analyzing, judging, worrying, and then deciding when and what to say next. Enjoyment while performing was rare - enjoyment would have been an indulgent loss of focus that comedy cannot afford.
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I couldn't see his face, because the light came in from behind him and he was in shadow, and he said, "I am Picasso." And I said, "Well, so what?
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Mirabelle is not affected by a man’s failures to approach her, as her own self-depreciating attitude never allows the idea that he would in the first place.
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I'm trying to think of other ones. Oh, yeah, I'd say - somebody would buy something and we'd say, and because you are our hundredth customer today, you get a free paperback.
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It's not the size of the nose that matters, it's what's inside that counts.
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No art comes from the conscious mind.
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I'm not Vegas. Places I play usually cost like $3 to get in, you know, and people are going: Gee, I've got $3, I think I'll throw it away.
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I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... an Arctic region covered with ice.
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The streets of L.A. undulate over short hills as though a finger is poking the landscape from underneath ... laid over this crosshatch are streets meandering on the diagonal creating a multitude of ways to get from one place to another by traveling along the hypotenuse. These are the avenues of the tryst which enable Acting Student A to travel the eighteen miles across town to Acting Student B's garage apartment in nine minutes flat after a hot-blooded phone call at midnight.
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I would like a wine. The purpose of the wine is to get me drunk. A bad wine will get me as drunk as a good wine. I would like the good wine. And since the result is the same no matter which wine I drink, I'd like to pay the bad wine price.
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A celebrity is any well-known TV or movie star who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair.
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I've put an umbrella in my mouth and opened it. I sat in a lemon-meringue pie. I've done terrible things to my dog with a fork.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn't know it because I was so happy all the time.
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In my opening seconds, I would say, "It's great to be here," then move to several other spots on the stage and say, "No, it's great to be here!" I would move again: "No, it's great to be here!
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Movies always are open to being remade because times change so much, and the tempo of movies changes. I think of it like a James Bond. They can have different actors play the same role... I've had people come up to me and say, 'We want to remake 'The Jerk' with so and so.' And I say, 'Fine.' It just doesn't bother me. It's an honor actually.
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The Apple Pie Hubbub was a significant novel for me, because that's when I first started using verbs.
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Comedy is not pretty.
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... you're nuts but you're welcome here.
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Lacy was just as happy alone as with company. When she was alone, she was potential; with others she was realized.
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College totally changed my life. It changed what I believe and what I think about everything. I majored in philosophy.
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Unlike Ray Porter, his love is fearless and without reservation.
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I did a lot of things when I first started out. In order to be in show business, I juggled, I did magic tricks, cards tricks and I played the banjo.
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I got a flue shot and now my chimney works perfectly.