Steve Martin Quotes
- All Quotes
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Comedy is not pretty.
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I believe in eight of the ten commandments. I believe in going to church every Sunday... unless there's a game on.
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The streets of L.A. undulate over short hills as though a finger is poking the landscape from underneath ... laid over this crosshatch are streets meandering on the diagonal creating a multitude of ways to get from one place to another by traveling along the hypotenuse. These are the avenues of the tryst which enable Acting Student A to travel the eighteen miles across town to Acting Student B's garage apartment in nine minutes flat after a hot-blooded phone call at midnight.
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I did stand-up comedy for 18 years. Ten of those years were spent learning, four years were spent refining, and four years were spent in wild success. I was seeking comic originality, and fame fell on me as a byproduct. The course was more plodding than heroic.
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Mirabelle is attractive; it's just that she is never the first or second girl chosen.
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I got a flue shot and now my chimney works perfectly.
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I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87.
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Lots of women are getting involved. They're not satisfied just being passengers anymore.
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The conscious mind is the editor, and the subconscious mind is the writer.
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It's not the size of the nose that matters, it's what's inside that counts.
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College totally changed my life. It changed what I believe and what I think about everything. I majored in philosophy.
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Unlike Ray Porter, his love is fearless and without reservation.
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I realized that comedians of the day were operating on jokes and punch lines. The moment you say the punch line, the audience either laughs sincerely or they laugh automatically or they don't laugh. The thing that bothered me was that automatic laugh. I said, that's not real laughter.
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They want me on the television shows now because I did so well on Celebrity Assholes.
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I loved to make people laugh in high school, and then I found I loved being on stage in front of people. I'm sure that's some kind of ego trip or a way to overcome shyness. I was very kind of shy and reserved, so there's a way to be on stage and be performing and balance your life out.
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Romance takes place when you first fall in love. It stirs all emotions and you can manipulate and be manipulated.
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After one of my plays came out, I had mixed reviews, some bad and some good. One day, it dawned on me. I thought, 'I wrote a play and he wrote a review, and that's the difference between him and me.'
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I guess I wouldn't believe in anything if it weren't for my lucky astrology mood watch.
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I really enjoy finding the right word, creating a good, flowing sentence. I enjoy the rhythm of the words.
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These days it's hard to look at a poodle without thinking what a good meal he would make.
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I knew I could only play Cyrano if he were Americanized. I had no intention of writing the script myself. I was afraid of it. You're playing with fire when you tamper with a classic. So I went looking for a writer. But it was such a personal idea, and anyone I would give it to would make it his own. It's hard to ask Neil Simon to write your idea.
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I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... an Arctic region covered with ice.
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Love is a promise delivered already broken.
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Bad psychoanalysis would say I enjoyed pleasing people, working really hard and pleasing people, which is probably related to my father in some way. But I really liked working hard. When I worked at Disneyland, I'd do 12 hours straight and go home thrilled.