Steve Martin Quotes
- All Quotes
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I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87.
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The banjo is such a happy instrument--you can't play a sad song on the banjo - it always comes out so cheerful.
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I've heard lots of people lie to themselves but they never fool anyone.
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Being on Twitter is like having a fern.
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When you're reaching for a star, there's a long way to fall.
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As a school board we felt it's an unfair expense to families. The lawsuit has a certain logic to it - if you have free public education, you can't put these things on top of it. It defeats the purpose.
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I thought 'Borat' was a breakthrough comedy, because it was really funny. It wasn't some studio-produced script with 14 writers.
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She didn't even finish her last sentence; it just trailed off. I think the subject had changed in her head while her mouth had continued on the old topic, not realizing it was out of supplies.
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Bad psychoanalysis would say I enjoyed pleasing people, working really hard and pleasing people, which is probably related to my father in some way. But I really liked working hard. When I worked at Disneyland, I'd do 12 hours straight and go home thrilled.
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The self-prepared dinner is a great time killer for lonely people and as much time should be spent on it as possible.
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I actually learned about sex watching neighborhood dogs. And it was good. Go ahead and laugh. I think the most important thing I learned was: Never let go of the girl's leg, no matter how hard she tries to shake you off.
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He gave her his phone number, in a peculiar reversal of dating procedure. She might have considered kissing him, even after the horrible first date, but he just didn’t seem to know what to do. However, Jeremy does have one outstanding quality. He likes her. And this quality in a person makes them infinitely interesting to the person who is being liked.
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Love is a promise delivered already broken.
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I started a grease fire at McDonald's - threw a match in the cook's hair.
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Writer's block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
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I knew I wanted to be in show business so I took the path of least resistance. I loved comedy. But you never know you are funny until people laugh. It's just what I was interested in. I could make people laugh, I guess, but doing it at school and doing it onstage are very different things.
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I ignored my stand-up career for twenty-five years, but now, having finished this memoir, I view this time with surprising warmth. One can have, it turns out, an affection for the war years.
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Or is it that I think too much?
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It was easier to sell a painting that was not for sale.
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I realized that comedians of the day were operating on jokes and punch lines. The moment you say the punch line, the audience either laughs sincerely or they laugh automatically or they don't laugh. The thing that bothered me was that automatic laugh. I said, that's not real laughter.
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I think I meant that, given the circumstances of my childhood, I had the illusion that it's easier to be alone. To have your relationships be casual and also to pose as a solitary person, because it was more romantic. You know, I was raised on the idea of the ramblin' man and the loner.
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She has learned that her body is precious and it mustn't be offered carelessly ever again, as it holds a direct connection to her heart.
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Writing is extremely personal, and that's the joy of it for me.
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Private companies have a lot of capital. They can run things efficiently and get projects built.