Andy Borowitz Quotes
Call me a dreamer, but I think it would be great if getting medical attention were as easy as getting a gun.
Quotes to Explore
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You want to know why there's a Texas Rangers? Well, here's the answer. You know how the six-gun came around? Well, here's the answer. You want to know why Mexicans allowed Americans to settle Texas in the first place? It was fear of Comanches.
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It's so easy to get used to playing a role. Then all of the sudden when you're tossed out of it, it's almost like you have to remember how to act again!
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I actually always had short hair as a kid, and it's really liberating. I recommend it. It's just very easy. I don't have to brush it.
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Freedom is not empowerment. Empowerment is what the Serbs have in Bosnia. Anybody can grab a gun and be empowered.
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It wasn't easy to get here, and it will not be easy to take my title away from me.
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If you attempt certain things at the right time, they are easy to accomplish - in fact, they almost get done by themselves. If you undertake them before the time is right, not only will they fail, but they will often become impossible to accomplish even when the time would have been right.
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Creativity may be hard to nurture, but it's easy to thwart.
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Make the hard ones look easy and the easy ones look hard.
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I went to start the first Ethiopian-led project in paleoanthropology, ever. Doing that was not easy.
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I'm very laid back, easy. There's nothing better in life than seeing your kids do well.
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The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.
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I'm not an easy customer. My attention to detail could probably drive you mad. My eye still always goes toward the single flaw.
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Most of these pictures, taken while travelling, were developed on the mantelpiece of a hotel room, which proves that the method is easy enough to carry out.
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Once you've wrestled, everything else in life is easy.
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I feel like moderate Republicans, who would support sensible gun violence legislation, are pushed aside by those folks who are absolutely beholden to the NRA.
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Fame is easy to acquire; impact is much more difficult.
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It's easy to focus on the things that divide us. Sometimes too easy.
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You cannot make easy decisions unless you first commit yourself to hard solutions.
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Power may be at the end of a gun, but sometimes it's also at the end of the shadow or the image of a gun.
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I think that we have a number of different health care challenges in our country, and certainly addressing the uninsured is one, and the second is making sure that those with health insurance actually get the care that they assume they'll have available to them if they get sick.
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Do not give up your authority and follow blindly the will of others. This way will lead to only delusion.
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Nobody bothers crazy people. ... In the end, maybe it's the crazy people who win after all.
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Call me a dreamer, but I think it would be great if getting medical attention were as easy as getting a gun.
