Bill Bailey (Mark Robert Bailey) Quotes

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "Why the long face?". The horse replies: "I'm deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

Bill Bailey

• Humor
• Aspect
• Walks
• Protected
• Barmen

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Quotes to Explore

• I think writers have to be proactive: they've got to use new technology and social media. Yes, it's hard to get noticed by traditional publishers, but there's a great deal of opportunity out there if you've got the right story.

  

  Ian Rankin
  • Great
  • Opportunity
  • Technology

• I would love to explore film seeing as I have prominently been on television. It would be nice to change it up and focus on film a little bit.

  

  Yvonne Strahovski
  • Up
  • Love
  • Change

• Explosions are not comfortable.

  

  Yevgeny Zamyatin
  • Comfortable
  • Explosions

• I'm very intelligent. I'm capable of doing everything put to me. I've launched a perfume and want my own hotel chain. I'm living proof blondes are not stupid.

  

  Paris Hilton
  • Intelligent
  • Living
  • Capable

• It helps if you don't date other actors, but actresses are beautiful. How can you say no?

  

  Adam Brody
  • Beautiful
  • You
  • Date

• If God came down here with the box that had the reason for living in it, I'd like to find just 2 words: The Music. That would be neat.

  

  Garth Brooks
  • Music
  • God
  • Words

• I came to America to become an architect. And somewhere along the line while I was still in school, I was lured into theater, and that's how I became interested in theater. My first play was something called 'A Banquet for the Moon.' It was a weird play.

  

  Mako
  • School
  • America
  • Weird

• The challenge in multi-lateral negotiations is not to lose sight of one's over-arching goal in the midst of the cacophony of opinions at the bargaining table.

  

  J. B. Pritzker
  • Challenge
  • Goal
  • Opinions

• With so many of our fundamental rights hanging in the balance, it is not good enough to simply roll the dice, hoping a nominee has changed his past views. It's not good enough to think, 'This is the best we can expect from this president'.

  

  Barbara Boxer
  • Good
  • Past
  • Best

• The future lies in designing and selling computers that people don't realize are computers at all.

  

  Adam Osborne
  • People
  • Future
  • Lies

• I don't think anybody ever really just retires where they don't do anything.

  

  Ozzie Smith
  • Think
  • Where
  • Ever

• I think the job of writing and literature is to encourage each one of us to believe that we're living in a story.

  

  Naomi Shihab Nye
  • Believe
  • Writing
  • Job

• I'm not, like, an action-hero guy.

  

  T. J. Miller
  • Guy
  • Action
  • Like

• The wise make proverbs, and fools repeat them.

  

  Isaac D'Israeli
  • Wise
  • Fools
  • Repeat

• And what would we be, we sinful creatures, without fear, perhaps the most foresighted, the most loving of the divine gifts?

  

  Umberto Eco
  • Fear
  • Divine
  • Creatures

• The Trojan War without Homer was nothing more than a battle over trade routes.

  

  B. W. Powe
  • War

• Acting is something that I've done since I was so young. I always felt - certainly as a teenager - really cynical about acting. I definitely didn't feel like it was something I wanted to do, and so I really took it for granted.

  

  Sarah Polley
  • Feels
  • Acting
  • Teenager

• One of these days, I'd like to put together a revue of all my music, which would probably turn into a marathon. There's a couple of hit songs from almost every phase of my career. At the same time, visually, if you don't handle it properly, it could be a cacophony of craziness, because there's just so many different kinds of music.

  

  Natalie Cole
  • Time
  • Music
  • Different

• I like the brooding man - a brooding man with a sense of humor.

  

  Maira Kalman
  • Man
  • Humor
  • Sense Of Humor

• You remind me of the Siberian hunting spider, which adopts a highly convincing limp in three of its eight legs in order to attract its main prey, the so-called Samaritan squirrel, which takes pity on the spider, and then the spider jumps on it and injects the paralyzing venom, while the squirrel remains bafflingly philosophical about the whole thing. Not to be confused with the Ukrainian hunting spider, which actually has got a limp and is, as such, completely harmless, and a little bit bitter about the whole thing.

  

  Bill Bailey
  • Humor
  • Confused
  • Philosophical

• What agent is there other than the Creator of the heavens and earth who can know whatever occurs in our heart, down to its most subtle and secret thoughts, and illuminate the future for us by establishing the Hereafter, saving us from the countless suffocating waves of the world?

  

  Said Nursi
  • World
  • Heart
  • Future

• A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "Why the long face?". The horse replies: "I'm deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

  

  Bill Bailey
  • Humor
  • Aspect
  • Walks