Zach Galifianakis Quotes
When I was in high school I used to sit by myself in the cafeteria - not necessarily by choice - but I thought it was funny to talk to people that weren't there.
Quotes to Explore
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I think most families have a few secrets or some strange aspect to their history. We're all fascinated by family dynamics, but I'd much rather sit in an audience and watch someone else's problems!
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Mostly people are ignorant, what is the language of painting. You know, they're ignorant. It is so difficult to make them aware, but time will teach them.
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I want to see more Asians on TV. I want to see more faces like mine on TV.
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I personally do not drink. To drink or not to is one's own choice. So long as it doesn't affect others, it is okay.
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If you date one woman a year, times 10 years, and that's 10 women.
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Almost all the early Christian Fathers were opposed to the death penalty, even though it was of course standard practice across the ancient world.
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Singing, writing songs, is kind of my biggest fear, but it's the thing I feel I need to conquer.
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My parents have been with me every step of the way.
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I love 'Husbands and Wives,' Woody Allen's movie. It's like one of my all-time favorites. I could watch it over and over again.
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What I don't miss is living in a small town where everybody knows you, your family, and what you ate for breakfast.
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Becoming a vampire means completely changing your identity.
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I put Tabasco sauce over everything. Or I put it on pretty much anything that wouldn't taste gross - I mean, I wouldn't put it on salad, but I like it on fried chicken, nachos... a lot of stuff.
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Death will never be pretty - its sights and smells too close and crude. And it will never come under our control: it gallops where we tiptoe, rips up our routines, burns our very breath with its heat and sting.
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There is no doubt in the sanctity of Mecca, but a donkey won't become a Hajj pilgrim by just going through the motions.
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Unless man is committed to the belief that all mankind are his brothers, then he labors in vain and hypocritically in the vineyards of equality.
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The Wood was about young people and the other one is more of a grown up movie.
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Unlike President Obama, I am not afraid to state, without a wink or a nod, that the government has no right to tell us who we can marry or not marry.
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I want to be able to be a father to my kids, where I've never seen my father, but my kids can see me whenever they want, so that was broken.
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There should be a policy to have a mechanism in place to decide when and how to import or export.
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It is a curious accident of history that the Christian religion became heavily involved with theology. No other religion finds it necessary to formulate elaborately precise statements about the abstract qualities and relationships of gods and humans. ... The idea that God may be approached and understood through intellectual analysis is uniquely Christian.
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I've worked on other shows where the sense is like, "Well, don't change it too much," you know? But on this one [ Too Much Tuna], Nick [Kroll] and John [Mulaney] - beyond being amazing performers - are also writers, and wanted to keep improving upon the show, particularly the play within a play. I think the writing just got funnier and funnier.
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Everybody thinks people who promote PETA don't eat meat, but I think animals were made to be eaten.
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This sign I give you: every people speaks its tongue of good and evil, which the neighbor does not understand. It has invented its own language of customs and rights.
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When I was in high school I used to sit by myself in the cafeteria - not necessarily by choice - but I thought it was funny to talk to people that weren't there.
